Abdullah J. Armada
Disclaimer: This convert story has been published on ChallengeYourSoul.com as is, without being edited. It may promote views & ideas not supported by ChallengeYourSoul.com and/or which are not Islamically correct.
Life. The very word conjures up images of events past and present, an infinite phantasmagoria of experiences, memories, and mental predictions, which we all go through.
What exactly is this experience of life? A dare? A quest? A random mix of experiences ending in inevitable, impersonal annihilation? Why does it seem that no matter how hard we’ve tried over the ages, man can’t seem to answer the questions as to where we are from, why we are here, and where we are going? The truth is that humankind has made numerous attempts throughout history to answer these questions and many attempts have come close while others have failed all together. The answer that man has formulated to these questions is religion. Religion and philosophy are attempts to answer these questions in the eyes of humankind. The world today is full of religions and different philosophies, some as old as Hinduism and some as young as Neo-Paganism, and this variety can be confusing to the elite few of my generation who seek the Truth. In an analytical sense, if one were to strip down all the major world religions to their essential core teachings, if one were to eliminate all the superfluous years and centuries of doctrine, dogma, corruption, innovation, etc. one would be left with one pure, pristine answer to the questions posed above. That answer, which everyone seeks, is God. Where are we from? God. Why are we here? God. Where are we going? God. Later, however, there comes another question. Namely, “how do we attain the peace and love we are all searching for?” Well, if the answer to the prior questions is God than it follows logically that in order to achieve the peace and love that God provides one must worship Him correctly. But again we are confronted with the same seemingly unsolvable conundrum, “with so many religions around, how do we know which one is correct?” There is only one answer, one system that has miraculously remained free of the corruption of human hands: Islam. Now, I could of course further elaborate and prove the existence of God, the legitimacy of Islam, etc. but I will opt to leave that for another writing, perhaps, and I will now describe my journey to Islam. I was born and raised as a Roman Catholic and I have attended Catholic schools all of my life, in fact, I still do. By the time I got to eighth grade I decided that the whole Christianity thing wasn’t working for me…call it my pacifistic adaptation of the usual angst-ridden teen rebellion. Essentially, I figured that I had been raised a Christian all my life and thus, in a sense, I had been indoctrinated into Christianity. So, I decided to try something else…some other way of viewing life. In summary, I tried many religions and each one lasted about one year. I was metaphorically caught in the eternal interplay of the spiritual “tennis court” of life. Most recently, I was Buddhist, and contrary to what most people believe, Buddhists do not worship the Buddha…in fact they have no “god”. Well, technically the Buddha never said you couldn’t believe in a “god” he just said it wasn’t required to attain enlightenment. Well, rather than go off on a tangent I will ask the reader to keep the last point in mind. What basically happened was that I started considering the existence of God. After all, it made logical sense to me, though rather than discuss that now, I’ll save it for a later time. Anyway, as I considered God I began to consider Islam because I had always had an incipient interest in Islam. I remember watching a video at school on world religions and I remember being so intrigued by the movements in the prayer, especially sujood…it was beautiful. I remember fighting that feeling inside of myself trying to convince myself that I was happy with the belief system I had. I remember looking at my compass, finding the direction of Mecca, and going through the little parts of the prayer movements that I knew always thinking, “If I were Muslim, this is what I’d do to pray.” I remember sounding out the shahada italicised in my “world religions” book thinking, “This would be what I’d say to become a Muslim.” I couldn’t explain why, but I was drawn to Islam and at the same time I fought that feeling because of fear. After September 11th, my interest was resurrected and with the money I saved I purchased “The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Understanding Islam” by Yahiya J. Emerick. The book was amazing as it outlined everything in a comprehensive manner and made me realize that there were many misconceptions about Islam. Later, I purchased “The Meaning of the Holy Qur’an” by Abdullah Yusuf Ali. All this time, my interest in Islam grew and I was drawn even closer to it. Eventually, I called the 1877-WHY ISLAM information line, which I had called many times before. Originally, I was calling to ask a question about a verse I had read but I ended up telling the sister I was speaking to about my interest in Islam and the fear I felt because of my family. In summary, this sister gave me the push I needed to overcome my fear and convert (revert). I am eternally grateful to Allah for having put her in my life to help guide me to Islam. At this point, I can respond with confidence that the search, which I undertook to find the Truth has ended in success because the whole Truth, the whole culmination of my search can be summed up in one statement: Ashahadu an la ilaha illa Allah wa Ashahadu anna Muhammadun abduhu wa rasulu. I testify that there is no god but ALLAH and I also testify that Muhammad is His slave and messenger.
Sura 27 - An-Naml [The Ant, The Ants] Verse 2-2:
2. هُدًى وَبُشْرَى لِلْمُؤْمِنِينَ
Sura 27 - An-Naml [The Ant, The Ants] Verse 2-2:
2. A guide: and glad tidings for the believers,-
Thursday, April 7, 2011
Abdullah Islam (Formerly ‘Kevin Combes’ Was a Born Again Christian)
Abdullah Islam (Formerly ‘Kevin Combes’ Was a Born Again Christian)
Disclaimer: This convert story has been published on ChallengeYourSoul.com as is, without being edited. It may promote views & ideas not supported by ChallengeYourSoul.com and/or which are not Islamically correct.
To explain to you why I chose Islam, I have to go back before Islam and I was born into a Catholic Protestant family, my Father was Catholic my Mother was Protestant but as my Father ruled the house it was a Catholic family.
Now I rejected the Catholic belief at a young age and from then I basically rebelled against this strict lifestyle that I was brought up in. From there I ended up on the streets, doing drugs, all messed up drinking alcohol totally shot. I was dragged out of the gutter by a man who trained me to be a weight lifter, gave me pride back into myself and told me while I was training my body I had to seek a spiritual path as well because physically it’s not enough there must also be a spiritual part of your life. So from there I went on a journey searching all the different faiths and I ended up being a born again Protestant Pentecostal Christian, preaching Jesus to everyone and anyone who would listen and who wouldn’t listen, basically I became a Bible basher.
So from there I traveled overseas, preaching Jesus, and telling people how Jesus could change their lives, save their life and the whole thing, and I used to debate scripture with people. One brother, a Christian brother, who I led to Jesus come up against me in a debate just at work. He was going on about the Trinity and he pointed out to me a simple thing that the Holy Trinity didn’t come about until 325 years after the death of Christ. Ok that’s 325 years after the death of Jesus and the resurrection to some people. It was a political move by emperor Constantine at the first council of Nicaea (325 AD) to unite the Romans and the Christians together to give him a power base, he basically decreed that Jesus was God and the Roman Sun Gods, because what happened was basically that Greek Roman mythology took over Christianity; Christianity did not take over Greek Roman mythology. The Roman Sun God’s birthday, which was the 25th December became Jesus’ birthday. The Roman’s Sunday became the holy Sabbath, also the counsel agreed that Jesus was the Son of God, the only begotten Father, the very God of the very God. And it also declared the Trinitarian concept, the official doctrine of the Pauline Church, which is basically the Roman Catholic Church. Now if you understand the Roman Catholic Church and the Protestant church, all the scriptures came from the Catholic Church, so all the canonical Gospels were in hands of the Catholics originally. They made the Gospels of Mathew, Mark, Luke and John, the only four Gospels. After that they went about destroying all the Hebrew Scriptures, there were over three hundred of them, written in the original Hebrew text and many of them were eyewitnesses accounts. So from there in 380 Emperor Constantinople of Rome made the Trinitarian base of belief, the Catholic faith obligatory to all his subjects, and it’s been that way since. That’s why Rome is the head of the faith. In 381 the counsel of Constantinople attended by 186 Bishops completed the three present head of the Trinity, and they added the God head of the Holy Spirit, and then from there in 381 Emperor Theodosius threatened to punish all that did not believe in the doctrine of the Trinity. That’s why we have the basic Trinitarian doctrine of all Christian faiths today, except for a few who believe that Jesus was not God, Jesus was a Prophet of God, a messenger of God, similar to Islam. Now the implications of the Trinitarian doctrine are truly obvious, they have nothing to do with the original teachings of Jesus, so for me that was a major, major turning point in my Christian faith, because if Jesus didn’t become God until 325 years after his death, what can I say, simple, you know this is a man made thing.
So I went about while I was preaching Christianity, I was going to preach Christianity to the Muslims. That was my intention, and I started learning about Islam. You go to any Christian bookshop and you will find a whole shelf on Islam. You go to any Islamic bookshop or center you won’t find anything about Christianity. Well the Christians were too busy worrying about the Muslims and the Muslims were too busy getting on with their business. They’re not worried about Christians, honestly the Christians think that the Muslims want to take over the world and that they want to invade this country, and that they want to do all these crazy things; they think that they’re storing guns underneath their Mosques, I assure you I’ve been to every Mosque in Perth and there are no guns. They’re not terrorists, I don’t know a single terrorist. I have never met one, I don’t know any, I don’t know any with those views.
So as I went about studying Islam, while I was a Christian, I could see the similarities between Islam and the Bible. Many of the teachings in the Bible were not necessarily the words that were originally said, it was the actions. Like Moses, being told to take off his shoes when he entered Holy ground, now never once did I take off my shoes when going to Church. No one did. But yet you go to a Mosque and everyone takes off their shoes, for it is Holy ground. Moses on his knees before God, Now Brothers and Sisters of Islam forgive me if I do not say Allah, but I’m talking to the Christians, and I’ll just use the word God. Because Christians have a tendency to believe that they have their God, and then Allah is a totally separate God, but he is not, he is God. Allah means, the one true God. So God being the One true God, the Creator of the heavens and the earth, the Creator of all things, the Creator of you. Moses was on his knees before God, Daniel on his knees before God, Abraham on his knees before God, Jesus (peace be upon Him) on his knees before God. You go to any Mosque, they are all on their knees before God, Brother and Sisters. I go to a Church, we’re all dancing around in front of a band, like a rock and roll concert, waving our hands about in the air, this is not worship. This is rock and roll. Job accepting the will of God, good or bad. Read your scriptures, understand them, look at them. Pray morning, noon and night, the only time we prayed was going to Church on Sunday, you walk around talking, if you’re talking to God, you should have a true fear of God, understanding of him, who is the Creator, be down upon your knees, have your head in the sand.
To me these were all the things that I could see were not happening in the Church, but were happening in the Mosques; was happening in Islam. In I Thessalonians 5:17 it says pray without ceasing. Now I prayed in tongues, a gift from the Holy Spirit, this is babble, nothing more than babble. In Islam there is a prayer when you walk in through the door, a prayer when you walk out through the door, there is a prayer when you walk into the toilet, a prayer when you walk out, a prayer when you hop in your car, a prayer when you hop out, a prayer for everything. In Islam you pray without ceasing, every action in your life is dedicated to Allah (God). The reverence and the respect of God is not a circus act, hyped up by music and rock and roll bands. Playing and being told that the presence of God was in the place because we were all hyped up on this great music, in anointing of God simply meant that the band was playing all together, because when the band wasn’t playing, the anointing wasn’t going too well.
Now last time I spoke, I said what was Ishmael’s crime, I didn’t get to go into detail then, so now I’ll go into detail. What was Ishmael’s crime? As a Christian I was told it didn’t matter if my Mother was a prostitute, a drug addict, my father was a derelict or what ever, I accept that God accepts me, I bow down to God, I believe in God that if I totally accept him he will accept me, that it doesn’t matter where I’ve been or what I’ve done.
Yet in the Old Testament Ishmael was rejected because he was the son of a slave woman, according to the Old Testament. As the son of a slave woman, the promises of God were not attributed to him, because he was a son of a slave woman, what a contradiction in teachings. So what was his crime? None, he was born to a slave woman, yet he stills loves God, revered God, worshiped God.
I found the Quran to be the most beautiful thing I’d ever heard in the world. I didn’t understand it, but it was beautiful. When I actually read the English text… I can’t put it into words. It has no contradictions, yet the Bible is full of contradictions. Now I’m not beating up on Christianity here, I’m just telling the things that changed my life, and the direction that I was heading.
Islam is a solution to racism. A little story for you folks, Jesus was not White, blonde haired and blue eyed. He was not necessarily black, but he wasn’t white, he was somewhere in between. Equality of the sexes, I love the fact that Islam 1400 years ago made men equal to women, it’s only 50-60 years ago that women in Western countries actually got equal rights, and yet in Islam they always have had equal rights. Islam preaches tolerance of Christians and Jews. Now as a Christian I was told to love, but yet in their actions and in the actions of how we were, the only time we entertained a Muslim, a Jew, a Buddhist, a Hindu is when we were trying to convert them. Now a Muslim will not Bible bash you or should I say Quran bash you, this statement does not exist in Islam, Quran bashing, because they don’t. If you wish to talk about it, they will talk about it, if you ask questions, they will talk to you about it. We as Muslims believe that you will come into the realization yourself, by the guidance of Allah (God).
Ephesians 6:12 For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood but against principalities against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places. All who were not Born again Christians were deceived by the devil and possessed by evil spirits, this is what I was taught.
In Islam we believe that not all Muslims are going to heaven, also that not all Christians and not all Jews will go to heaven; some Muslims, some Christians and some Jews will go to heaven; those who have a love for God and follow his ways and are righteous. But to a Born again Christian all I had to do was accept Jesus, and all my sins were washed away, and I was going to heaven, free ticket. Didn’t matter what I did wrong as long as I pleaded the blood of Jesus over myself, prayed, was repentant was still going to heaven, and everybody else wasn’t going there. Now who am I to make that choice? Who is this doctrine to make that choice? The only choice is by God. He decides who goes to heaven and who doesn’t go to heaven, no one else. And only God can forgive your sins, not a man that became God 325 years after he walked the Earth. God in all of his infinite wisdom and power and glory can forgive your sins, just like that. You don’t need to accept anything; you just need to be repentant. In the Quran it says;
“Who could be better in religion than one who submits his whole self to God, does good and follows the way of Abraham, the true in faith for God did take Abraham for a friend” [4:125]
It explains itself right there. What has happened to me since I have become a Muslim?
I’ve come out of the darkness and into the light; I’m a slave only to Allah. I have complete internal peace beyond all description, that I never found as a Christian.
Now it doesn’t matter if I am going through hassles in my job. Doesn’t matter if I am going through hassles everywhere else. It doesn’t matter if I am being discriminated against, because I am a Muslim, which has happened in this free democratic society that we live in, for I never experienced these things until I became a Muslim. Let me tell you something about discrimination people, you have no idea about discrimination unless you are being discriminated against. You can say “oh no he’s not being discriminated against” or she’s not being discriminated against, because you’re from the outside looking in. But when you are being discriminated against, when you are being harassed, you know it, not necessarily everybody else. Why did I choose Islam? Because I simply cannot deny the truth. Islam is the truth and the truth has set me free. Ash-hadu anlaa ilaha illa allah wa ash hadu anna Muhammadan abduhu wa rasuuluh.
Thank you very much.
Sura 51 - Adh-Dhariyat [The Winnowing winds] Verse 23-23:
23. فَوَرَبِّ السَّمَاءِ وَالأرْضِ إِنَّهُ لَحَقٌّ مِثْلَ مَا أَنَّكُمْ تَنْطِقُونَ
Sura 51 - Adh-Dhariyat [The Winnowing winds] Verse 23-23:
23. Then, by the Lord of heaven and earth, this is the very Truth, as much as the fact that ye can speak intelligently to each other.
Disclaimer: This convert story has been published on ChallengeYourSoul.com as is, without being edited. It may promote views & ideas not supported by ChallengeYourSoul.com and/or which are not Islamically correct.
To explain to you why I chose Islam, I have to go back before Islam and I was born into a Catholic Protestant family, my Father was Catholic my Mother was Protestant but as my Father ruled the house it was a Catholic family.
Now I rejected the Catholic belief at a young age and from then I basically rebelled against this strict lifestyle that I was brought up in. From there I ended up on the streets, doing drugs, all messed up drinking alcohol totally shot. I was dragged out of the gutter by a man who trained me to be a weight lifter, gave me pride back into myself and told me while I was training my body I had to seek a spiritual path as well because physically it’s not enough there must also be a spiritual part of your life. So from there I went on a journey searching all the different faiths and I ended up being a born again Protestant Pentecostal Christian, preaching Jesus to everyone and anyone who would listen and who wouldn’t listen, basically I became a Bible basher.
So from there I traveled overseas, preaching Jesus, and telling people how Jesus could change their lives, save their life and the whole thing, and I used to debate scripture with people. One brother, a Christian brother, who I led to Jesus come up against me in a debate just at work. He was going on about the Trinity and he pointed out to me a simple thing that the Holy Trinity didn’t come about until 325 years after the death of Christ. Ok that’s 325 years after the death of Jesus and the resurrection to some people. It was a political move by emperor Constantine at the first council of Nicaea (325 AD) to unite the Romans and the Christians together to give him a power base, he basically decreed that Jesus was God and the Roman Sun Gods, because what happened was basically that Greek Roman mythology took over Christianity; Christianity did not take over Greek Roman mythology. The Roman Sun God’s birthday, which was the 25th December became Jesus’ birthday. The Roman’s Sunday became the holy Sabbath, also the counsel agreed that Jesus was the Son of God, the only begotten Father, the very God of the very God. And it also declared the Trinitarian concept, the official doctrine of the Pauline Church, which is basically the Roman Catholic Church. Now if you understand the Roman Catholic Church and the Protestant church, all the scriptures came from the Catholic Church, so all the canonical Gospels were in hands of the Catholics originally. They made the Gospels of Mathew, Mark, Luke and John, the only four Gospels. After that they went about destroying all the Hebrew Scriptures, there were over three hundred of them, written in the original Hebrew text and many of them were eyewitnesses accounts. So from there in 380 Emperor Constantinople of Rome made the Trinitarian base of belief, the Catholic faith obligatory to all his subjects, and it’s been that way since. That’s why Rome is the head of the faith. In 381 the counsel of Constantinople attended by 186 Bishops completed the three present head of the Trinity, and they added the God head of the Holy Spirit, and then from there in 381 Emperor Theodosius threatened to punish all that did not believe in the doctrine of the Trinity. That’s why we have the basic Trinitarian doctrine of all Christian faiths today, except for a few who believe that Jesus was not God, Jesus was a Prophet of God, a messenger of God, similar to Islam. Now the implications of the Trinitarian doctrine are truly obvious, they have nothing to do with the original teachings of Jesus, so for me that was a major, major turning point in my Christian faith, because if Jesus didn’t become God until 325 years after his death, what can I say, simple, you know this is a man made thing.
So I went about while I was preaching Christianity, I was going to preach Christianity to the Muslims. That was my intention, and I started learning about Islam. You go to any Christian bookshop and you will find a whole shelf on Islam. You go to any Islamic bookshop or center you won’t find anything about Christianity. Well the Christians were too busy worrying about the Muslims and the Muslims were too busy getting on with their business. They’re not worried about Christians, honestly the Christians think that the Muslims want to take over the world and that they want to invade this country, and that they want to do all these crazy things; they think that they’re storing guns underneath their Mosques, I assure you I’ve been to every Mosque in Perth and there are no guns. They’re not terrorists, I don’t know a single terrorist. I have never met one, I don’t know any, I don’t know any with those views.
So as I went about studying Islam, while I was a Christian, I could see the similarities between Islam and the Bible. Many of the teachings in the Bible were not necessarily the words that were originally said, it was the actions. Like Moses, being told to take off his shoes when he entered Holy ground, now never once did I take off my shoes when going to Church. No one did. But yet you go to a Mosque and everyone takes off their shoes, for it is Holy ground. Moses on his knees before God, Now Brothers and Sisters of Islam forgive me if I do not say Allah, but I’m talking to the Christians, and I’ll just use the word God. Because Christians have a tendency to believe that they have their God, and then Allah is a totally separate God, but he is not, he is God. Allah means, the one true God. So God being the One true God, the Creator of the heavens and the earth, the Creator of all things, the Creator of you. Moses was on his knees before God, Daniel on his knees before God, Abraham on his knees before God, Jesus (peace be upon Him) on his knees before God. You go to any Mosque, they are all on their knees before God, Brother and Sisters. I go to a Church, we’re all dancing around in front of a band, like a rock and roll concert, waving our hands about in the air, this is not worship. This is rock and roll. Job accepting the will of God, good or bad. Read your scriptures, understand them, look at them. Pray morning, noon and night, the only time we prayed was going to Church on Sunday, you walk around talking, if you’re talking to God, you should have a true fear of God, understanding of him, who is the Creator, be down upon your knees, have your head in the sand.
To me these were all the things that I could see were not happening in the Church, but were happening in the Mosques; was happening in Islam. In I Thessalonians 5:17 it says pray without ceasing. Now I prayed in tongues, a gift from the Holy Spirit, this is babble, nothing more than babble. In Islam there is a prayer when you walk in through the door, a prayer when you walk out through the door, there is a prayer when you walk into the toilet, a prayer when you walk out, a prayer when you hop in your car, a prayer when you hop out, a prayer for everything. In Islam you pray without ceasing, every action in your life is dedicated to Allah (God). The reverence and the respect of God is not a circus act, hyped up by music and rock and roll bands. Playing and being told that the presence of God was in the place because we were all hyped up on this great music, in anointing of God simply meant that the band was playing all together, because when the band wasn’t playing, the anointing wasn’t going too well.
Now last time I spoke, I said what was Ishmael’s crime, I didn’t get to go into detail then, so now I’ll go into detail. What was Ishmael’s crime? As a Christian I was told it didn’t matter if my Mother was a prostitute, a drug addict, my father was a derelict or what ever, I accept that God accepts me, I bow down to God, I believe in God that if I totally accept him he will accept me, that it doesn’t matter where I’ve been or what I’ve done.
Yet in the Old Testament Ishmael was rejected because he was the son of a slave woman, according to the Old Testament. As the son of a slave woman, the promises of God were not attributed to him, because he was a son of a slave woman, what a contradiction in teachings. So what was his crime? None, he was born to a slave woman, yet he stills loves God, revered God, worshiped God.
I found the Quran to be the most beautiful thing I’d ever heard in the world. I didn’t understand it, but it was beautiful. When I actually read the English text… I can’t put it into words. It has no contradictions, yet the Bible is full of contradictions. Now I’m not beating up on Christianity here, I’m just telling the things that changed my life, and the direction that I was heading.
Islam is a solution to racism. A little story for you folks, Jesus was not White, blonde haired and blue eyed. He was not necessarily black, but he wasn’t white, he was somewhere in between. Equality of the sexes, I love the fact that Islam 1400 years ago made men equal to women, it’s only 50-60 years ago that women in Western countries actually got equal rights, and yet in Islam they always have had equal rights. Islam preaches tolerance of Christians and Jews. Now as a Christian I was told to love, but yet in their actions and in the actions of how we were, the only time we entertained a Muslim, a Jew, a Buddhist, a Hindu is when we were trying to convert them. Now a Muslim will not Bible bash you or should I say Quran bash you, this statement does not exist in Islam, Quran bashing, because they don’t. If you wish to talk about it, they will talk about it, if you ask questions, they will talk to you about it. We as Muslims believe that you will come into the realization yourself, by the guidance of Allah (God).
Ephesians 6:12 For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood but against principalities against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places. All who were not Born again Christians were deceived by the devil and possessed by evil spirits, this is what I was taught.
In Islam we believe that not all Muslims are going to heaven, also that not all Christians and not all Jews will go to heaven; some Muslims, some Christians and some Jews will go to heaven; those who have a love for God and follow his ways and are righteous. But to a Born again Christian all I had to do was accept Jesus, and all my sins were washed away, and I was going to heaven, free ticket. Didn’t matter what I did wrong as long as I pleaded the blood of Jesus over myself, prayed, was repentant was still going to heaven, and everybody else wasn’t going there. Now who am I to make that choice? Who is this doctrine to make that choice? The only choice is by God. He decides who goes to heaven and who doesn’t go to heaven, no one else. And only God can forgive your sins, not a man that became God 325 years after he walked the Earth. God in all of his infinite wisdom and power and glory can forgive your sins, just like that. You don’t need to accept anything; you just need to be repentant. In the Quran it says;
“Who could be better in religion than one who submits his whole self to God, does good and follows the way of Abraham, the true in faith for God did take Abraham for a friend” [4:125]
It explains itself right there. What has happened to me since I have become a Muslim?
I’ve come out of the darkness and into the light; I’m a slave only to Allah. I have complete internal peace beyond all description, that I never found as a Christian.
Now it doesn’t matter if I am going through hassles in my job. Doesn’t matter if I am going through hassles everywhere else. It doesn’t matter if I am being discriminated against, because I am a Muslim, which has happened in this free democratic society that we live in, for I never experienced these things until I became a Muslim. Let me tell you something about discrimination people, you have no idea about discrimination unless you are being discriminated against. You can say “oh no he’s not being discriminated against” or she’s not being discriminated against, because you’re from the outside looking in. But when you are being discriminated against, when you are being harassed, you know it, not necessarily everybody else. Why did I choose Islam? Because I simply cannot deny the truth. Islam is the truth and the truth has set me free. Ash-hadu anlaa ilaha illa allah wa ash hadu anna Muhammadan abduhu wa rasuuluh.
Thank you very much.
Sura 51 - Adh-Dhariyat [The Winnowing winds] Verse 23-23:
23. فَوَرَبِّ السَّمَاءِ وَالأرْضِ إِنَّهُ لَحَقٌّ مِثْلَ مَا أَنَّكُمْ تَنْطِقُونَ
Sura 51 - Adh-Dhariyat [The Winnowing winds] Verse 23-23:
23. Then, by the Lord of heaven and earth, this is the very Truth, as much as the fact that ye can speak intelligently to each other.
Abdul-Lateef Abdullah (Steven Krauss)
Abdul-Lateef Abdullah (Steven Krauss)
Disclaimer: This convert story has been published on ChallengeYourSoul.com as is, without being edited. It may promote views & ideas not supported by ChallengeYourSoul.com and/or which are not Islamically correct.
My journey to Islam - How Malay martial arts led a theologically dissatisfied American Protestant to Islam.
My experience in Islam began as a graduate student in New York City in 1998. Up to that point in my life, for 25 years, I had been a Protestant Christian, but had not been practicing my religion for quite some time. I was more interested in “spirituality” and looking for anything that didn’t have to do with organized religion. To me, Christianity was out of touch and not relevant to the times. It was hard for me to find anything in it that I could apply to my everyday life. This disillusion with Christianity led me to shun everything that claimed to be organized religion, due to my assumption that they were all pretty much the same, or at least in terms of their lack of relevance and usefulness.
Much of my frustration with Christianity stemmed from its lack of knowledge and guidance around the nature of God, and the individual’s relationship to Him. To me, the Christian philosophy depends on this rather bizarre intermediary relationship that we are supposed to have with Jesus, who on one hand was a man, but was also divine. For me, this difficult and very vague relationship with our Creator left me searching for something that could provide me with a better understanding of God, and our relationship to Him. Why couldn’t I just pray directly to God? Why did I have to begin and end every prayer with “in the name of Jesus Christ?” How can an eternal, omnipotent Creator and Sustainer also take the form of a man? Why would He need to? These were just a few of the questions that I could not resolve and come to terms with. Thus, I was hungry for a more straightforward and lucid approach to religion that could provide my life with true guidance, not just dogma that was void of knowledge based in reason.
While in graduate school I had a Jewish roommate who was a student of the martial arts. While I was living with him he was studying an art called silat, a traditional Malaysian martial art that is based on the teachings of Islam. When my roommate would come home from his silat classes he would tell me all about the uniqueness of silat and its rich spiritual dimension. As I was quite interested in learning martial arts at the time, I was intrigued by what I had heard, and decided to accompany my roommate to class one Saturday morning. Although I did not realize it at the time, my experience in Islam was beginning that morning at my first silat class in New York City back on February 28th, 1998. There I met my teacher, Cikgu (which means teacher in Malay) Sulaiman, the man who would first orient me to the religion of Islam. Although I thought I was beginning a career as a martial artist, that day back in 1998 actually represented my first step toward becoming Muslim.
From the very beginning I was intrigued by silat and Islam and began spending as much time as possible with my teacher. As my roommate and I were equally passionate about silat, we would go to my teacher’s house and soak up as much knowledge as we could from him. In fact, upon our completing graduate school in the spring of 1998, upon his invitation, we spent the entire summer living with him and his wife. As my learning in silat increased, so did my learning about Islam, a religion that I had hardly any knowledge of prior to my experience in silat.
What made my orientation to Islam so powerful was that as I was learning about it, I was also living it. Because I studied at the home of my teacher, being in the presence of devout Muslims allowed me to be constantly surrounded by the sounds, sights and practices of Islam. For as Islam is an entire lifestyle, when you are in an Islamic environment, you cannot separate it out from everyday life. Unlike Christianity, which lends toward a separation between daily life and religion, Islam requires its’ followers to integrate worship of Allah into everything we do. Thus, in living with my teacher, I was immersed in the Islamic deen (lifestyle) and experiencing first-hand how it can shape one’s entire way of life.
In the beginning Islam was very different and powerful to me. It was also very foreign in many ways and the amount of discipline it requires was difficult to understand. At the time I was liberal in many ways, and was used to shunning anything dogmatic or imposed, regardless of where it came from! As time went on, however, and my understanding of Islam grew, I began to slowly see that what seemed to be religious dogma was really a lifestyle put forth to us by our Creator. This lifestyle, I would later learn, is the straight path to true contentment, not just the sensual and superficial way of life that my society and culture promote. I realized that the question is quite simple actually. Who could possibly know better what the best way of life is for human beings than the all-wise Creator?
From that first silat class in New York City to the day I took my shahadda, July 30, 1999, I had undergone a thorough self-examination that was comprised of two major processes. One was to question the culture of the society I was brought up in, and the second was to question the role I wanted religion to play in my everyday life. As for my culture, this one was not as difficult as most people would think.
American culture is highly influential on how we see life because it constantly bombards us with sensual gratification aimed at appealing to our worldly desires. In America happiness is defined by what we have and consume, thus, the entire culture is geared toward the marketplace. Unless we are removed from this type of environment it is difficult to see it’s drawbacks, which are based on worshipping and putting faith in everything but God, the only One that can provide us with real, lasting contentment in our lives.
Being a social scientist by trade, much of my professional time is spent trying to address the social ills of our society. As I learned more about Islam, I came to the conclusion that many societal ills are based on unhealthy social behaviour. Since Islam is a lifestyle focused totally on the most healthy, positive way of conducting our lives in every setting, then it is, and will always be, the only real answer to any of society’s social dilemmas. With this realization, not only did I decide that Islam was relevant to my everyday life, but I began to understand why it is so different from other religions. Only Islam provides knowledge and guidance for every aspect of life. Only Islam provides a way to achieve health and happiness in every dimension of life – physical, spiritual, mental, financial, etc. Only Islam provides us with a clear life goal and purpose. And only Islam shows us the proper way to live in and contribute to a community. Islam is what everyone needs, and what so many who have not found it yet, are searching for. It is the path to purpose, meaning, health and happiness. This is because it is the straight path to the source of truth and real power – Allah.
It was only until I actually became Muslim that I realized just how encompassing the Islamic lifestyle is. Literally everything we do has one underlying purpose – to remember Allah. The lifestyle provides us with the way – not just the understanding – but an actual method of constantly remembering our Creator in as simple an act as greeting someone, or getting dressed in the morning, or waking up from sleep. Islam shows us that by remembering Allah, everything we do becomes focused on Him, and thus becomes an act of worship. From this, our energy, our thoughts, and our actions all become redirected away from unhealthy and useless causes, and focused on the source of all goodness. Thus, we are continuously tapping into His divine strength, mercy and grace. So, by remembering Allah constantly, we become stronger and healthier in every aspect of our lives and not distracted by self-defeating thoughts and behaviours.
There still remain some minor aspects of Islam that have proven to be somewhat difficult adjustments for me. Nevertheless, I thank Allah everyday for the ease to which he has allowed me to make the necessary changes in my life so that I can continue to live in America and still be, Insha-Allah, a good Muslim. As a white, middle-class American, many cultural aspects of Islam are quite different from the way in which I grew up. In fact, when I finally broke the news to my family that I had become Muslim, almost all of their questions and concerns were related to cultural differences – marriage, social life, family, etc. They were much less concerned about my general beliefs about God and religious practice. For my family, friends, and co-workers, becoming Muslim was not seen necessarily as a negative change, but it has required a great deal of education about Islam.
Because acquiring knowledge is a critical component to a Muslim’s development, having a teacher who has taught me how to apply Islam in everyday life has made all the difference in managing whatever difficulties I have experienced from my reversion. Having someone knowledgeable you can turn to whenever you have questions is a wonderful support that every new shahada should go out of their way to find. Islam is not a religion that can be rationalized, in the way that Christianity and Judaism are. It is a clear path that must be followed just as
Allah has laid out for us through the Qur’an and the lives of our beloved Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.), his companions, and the saints of Islam.
In this day and age, in this society, discerning the path can often be difficult, especially when we are constantly faced with questions and doubts from people who on the surface may not be hostile to Islam, but whose general lack of faith can have a harmful effect on someone who bases everything they do on their love for Allah. It is also not easy being in an environment where we are constantly bombarded with sensual temptations that are seen as ordinary, common aspects of everyday life. But when we have the support of a knowledgeable, experienced teacher, who is able to apply the universal teachings of Islam to his life, then the truth becomes clear from error, exactly how Allah (SWT) describes in the Qur’an. From this, we are able to understand how to apply Islam correctly to our own lives, and Insha-Allah receive Allah’s many blessings. The ultimate test, however, of anyone who claims to have true and right knowledge, is to look at how they apply it in their own lives. If their actions support their teachings, then and only then should we look to them for guidance.
My journey to Islam has been a life-altering experience. It is one that with every passing day, makes me more and more appreciative and thankful to Almighty Allah. The extent of His mercy can only fully be understood from the perspective of a Muslim – one who prostrates regularly and submits their will to that of the Creator.
I look back at my life prior to Islam and reflect on the different ways I sought guidance. I think back to all the different ideas I once had of who God really is, and how we can become close to Him. I look back now with a smile and perhaps even a tear because now I know the truth. Through Islam, I know why so many people who do not believe have so much fear inside them.
Life can be very scary without God. I know, because I once harboured that same level of fear. Now, however, I have the ultimate “self-help” program. It’s the self-help program without the self. It’s the path that puts everything is in its proper place. Now, life makes sense. Now, life is order. Now, I know why I am here, where I want to go, what I want my life to be, how I want to live, and what is most important not just to me, but to everyone. I only hope and pray that others who have not found the path yet, can feel the same that I do. Ya arhama rahimeen wal hamdulillahi rabbil aylameen
Disclaimer: This convert story has been published on ChallengeYourSoul.com as is, without being edited. It may promote views & ideas not supported by ChallengeYourSoul.com and/or which are not Islamically correct.
My journey to Islam - How Malay martial arts led a theologically dissatisfied American Protestant to Islam.
My experience in Islam began as a graduate student in New York City in 1998. Up to that point in my life, for 25 years, I had been a Protestant Christian, but had not been practicing my religion for quite some time. I was more interested in “spirituality” and looking for anything that didn’t have to do with organized religion. To me, Christianity was out of touch and not relevant to the times. It was hard for me to find anything in it that I could apply to my everyday life. This disillusion with Christianity led me to shun everything that claimed to be organized religion, due to my assumption that they were all pretty much the same, or at least in terms of their lack of relevance and usefulness.
Much of my frustration with Christianity stemmed from its lack of knowledge and guidance around the nature of God, and the individual’s relationship to Him. To me, the Christian philosophy depends on this rather bizarre intermediary relationship that we are supposed to have with Jesus, who on one hand was a man, but was also divine. For me, this difficult and very vague relationship with our Creator left me searching for something that could provide me with a better understanding of God, and our relationship to Him. Why couldn’t I just pray directly to God? Why did I have to begin and end every prayer with “in the name of Jesus Christ?” How can an eternal, omnipotent Creator and Sustainer also take the form of a man? Why would He need to? These were just a few of the questions that I could not resolve and come to terms with. Thus, I was hungry for a more straightforward and lucid approach to religion that could provide my life with true guidance, not just dogma that was void of knowledge based in reason.
While in graduate school I had a Jewish roommate who was a student of the martial arts. While I was living with him he was studying an art called silat, a traditional Malaysian martial art that is based on the teachings of Islam. When my roommate would come home from his silat classes he would tell me all about the uniqueness of silat and its rich spiritual dimension. As I was quite interested in learning martial arts at the time, I was intrigued by what I had heard, and decided to accompany my roommate to class one Saturday morning. Although I did not realize it at the time, my experience in Islam was beginning that morning at my first silat class in New York City back on February 28th, 1998. There I met my teacher, Cikgu (which means teacher in Malay) Sulaiman, the man who would first orient me to the religion of Islam. Although I thought I was beginning a career as a martial artist, that day back in 1998 actually represented my first step toward becoming Muslim.
From the very beginning I was intrigued by silat and Islam and began spending as much time as possible with my teacher. As my roommate and I were equally passionate about silat, we would go to my teacher’s house and soak up as much knowledge as we could from him. In fact, upon our completing graduate school in the spring of 1998, upon his invitation, we spent the entire summer living with him and his wife. As my learning in silat increased, so did my learning about Islam, a religion that I had hardly any knowledge of prior to my experience in silat.
What made my orientation to Islam so powerful was that as I was learning about it, I was also living it. Because I studied at the home of my teacher, being in the presence of devout Muslims allowed me to be constantly surrounded by the sounds, sights and practices of Islam. For as Islam is an entire lifestyle, when you are in an Islamic environment, you cannot separate it out from everyday life. Unlike Christianity, which lends toward a separation between daily life and religion, Islam requires its’ followers to integrate worship of Allah into everything we do. Thus, in living with my teacher, I was immersed in the Islamic deen (lifestyle) and experiencing first-hand how it can shape one’s entire way of life.
In the beginning Islam was very different and powerful to me. It was also very foreign in many ways and the amount of discipline it requires was difficult to understand. At the time I was liberal in many ways, and was used to shunning anything dogmatic or imposed, regardless of where it came from! As time went on, however, and my understanding of Islam grew, I began to slowly see that what seemed to be religious dogma was really a lifestyle put forth to us by our Creator. This lifestyle, I would later learn, is the straight path to true contentment, not just the sensual and superficial way of life that my society and culture promote. I realized that the question is quite simple actually. Who could possibly know better what the best way of life is for human beings than the all-wise Creator?
From that first silat class in New York City to the day I took my shahadda, July 30, 1999, I had undergone a thorough self-examination that was comprised of two major processes. One was to question the culture of the society I was brought up in, and the second was to question the role I wanted religion to play in my everyday life. As for my culture, this one was not as difficult as most people would think.
American culture is highly influential on how we see life because it constantly bombards us with sensual gratification aimed at appealing to our worldly desires. In America happiness is defined by what we have and consume, thus, the entire culture is geared toward the marketplace. Unless we are removed from this type of environment it is difficult to see it’s drawbacks, which are based on worshipping and putting faith in everything but God, the only One that can provide us with real, lasting contentment in our lives.
Being a social scientist by trade, much of my professional time is spent trying to address the social ills of our society. As I learned more about Islam, I came to the conclusion that many societal ills are based on unhealthy social behaviour. Since Islam is a lifestyle focused totally on the most healthy, positive way of conducting our lives in every setting, then it is, and will always be, the only real answer to any of society’s social dilemmas. With this realization, not only did I decide that Islam was relevant to my everyday life, but I began to understand why it is so different from other religions. Only Islam provides knowledge and guidance for every aspect of life. Only Islam provides a way to achieve health and happiness in every dimension of life – physical, spiritual, mental, financial, etc. Only Islam provides us with a clear life goal and purpose. And only Islam shows us the proper way to live in and contribute to a community. Islam is what everyone needs, and what so many who have not found it yet, are searching for. It is the path to purpose, meaning, health and happiness. This is because it is the straight path to the source of truth and real power – Allah.
It was only until I actually became Muslim that I realized just how encompassing the Islamic lifestyle is. Literally everything we do has one underlying purpose – to remember Allah. The lifestyle provides us with the way – not just the understanding – but an actual method of constantly remembering our Creator in as simple an act as greeting someone, or getting dressed in the morning, or waking up from sleep. Islam shows us that by remembering Allah, everything we do becomes focused on Him, and thus becomes an act of worship. From this, our energy, our thoughts, and our actions all become redirected away from unhealthy and useless causes, and focused on the source of all goodness. Thus, we are continuously tapping into His divine strength, mercy and grace. So, by remembering Allah constantly, we become stronger and healthier in every aspect of our lives and not distracted by self-defeating thoughts and behaviours.
There still remain some minor aspects of Islam that have proven to be somewhat difficult adjustments for me. Nevertheless, I thank Allah everyday for the ease to which he has allowed me to make the necessary changes in my life so that I can continue to live in America and still be, Insha-Allah, a good Muslim. As a white, middle-class American, many cultural aspects of Islam are quite different from the way in which I grew up. In fact, when I finally broke the news to my family that I had become Muslim, almost all of their questions and concerns were related to cultural differences – marriage, social life, family, etc. They were much less concerned about my general beliefs about God and religious practice. For my family, friends, and co-workers, becoming Muslim was not seen necessarily as a negative change, but it has required a great deal of education about Islam.
Because acquiring knowledge is a critical component to a Muslim’s development, having a teacher who has taught me how to apply Islam in everyday life has made all the difference in managing whatever difficulties I have experienced from my reversion. Having someone knowledgeable you can turn to whenever you have questions is a wonderful support that every new shahada should go out of their way to find. Islam is not a religion that can be rationalized, in the way that Christianity and Judaism are. It is a clear path that must be followed just as
Allah has laid out for us through the Qur’an and the lives of our beloved Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.), his companions, and the saints of Islam.
In this day and age, in this society, discerning the path can often be difficult, especially when we are constantly faced with questions and doubts from people who on the surface may not be hostile to Islam, but whose general lack of faith can have a harmful effect on someone who bases everything they do on their love for Allah. It is also not easy being in an environment where we are constantly bombarded with sensual temptations that are seen as ordinary, common aspects of everyday life. But when we have the support of a knowledgeable, experienced teacher, who is able to apply the universal teachings of Islam to his life, then the truth becomes clear from error, exactly how Allah (SWT) describes in the Qur’an. From this, we are able to understand how to apply Islam correctly to our own lives, and Insha-Allah receive Allah’s many blessings. The ultimate test, however, of anyone who claims to have true and right knowledge, is to look at how they apply it in their own lives. If their actions support their teachings, then and only then should we look to them for guidance.
My journey to Islam has been a life-altering experience. It is one that with every passing day, makes me more and more appreciative and thankful to Almighty Allah. The extent of His mercy can only fully be understood from the perspective of a Muslim – one who prostrates regularly and submits their will to that of the Creator.
I look back at my life prior to Islam and reflect on the different ways I sought guidance. I think back to all the different ideas I once had of who God really is, and how we can become close to Him. I look back now with a smile and perhaps even a tear because now I know the truth. Through Islam, I know why so many people who do not believe have so much fear inside them.
Life can be very scary without God. I know, because I once harboured that same level of fear. Now, however, I have the ultimate “self-help” program. It’s the self-help program without the self. It’s the path that puts everything is in its proper place. Now, life makes sense. Now, life is order. Now, I know why I am here, where I want to go, what I want my life to be, how I want to live, and what is most important not just to me, but to everyone. I only hope and pray that others who have not found the path yet, can feel the same that I do. Ya arhama rahimeen wal hamdulillahi rabbil aylameen
My Conversion Unto Him
My Conversion Unto Him
Aaron Haroon Sellars
Disclaimer: This convert story has been published on ChallengeYourSoul.com as is, without being edited. It may promote views & ideas not supported by ChallengeYourSoul.com and/or which are not Islamically correct.
Why did I accept Islam? This is a question that I have been asked many times by others, and a question that I have asked myself many times.
Firstly, it was the Will of God because it is He that changes hearts and guides someone to a way that is straight! Secondly, because I was looking for the truth, the real truth and nothing but the truth! Thirdly, because there were doctrinal elements in my previous religion of Christianity that at first hearing seemed acceptable but when reflected, analyzed, and prayed upon, proved to be not only unacceptable but also contradictory, inconsistent, and even blasphemous! But why ISLAM? Why, when I was looking for the real and whole truth did God guide me to Islam and not to one of many religions available to man or just another branch of Christianity? The answer to this important question was to unfold as I took my first steps towards my spiritual quest.
The basic seed of God-consciousness was implanted in me from birth, but my soul was moulded to the teachings of the Christian church. My religious upbringing was never something that was forced, nor was it just occasional or just habitual. It seemed to be a natural and essential part of the fibre of my family. One of my fondest childhood memories till this day is of my mother reading me Bible stories every Sunday. But when I reached my teens and especially when I entered college, that spiritual nurturing became tainted more and more.
The college scene is where most people of religious background either completely abandon that upbringing or like in my case, just put it on pause. It’s really hard not to when you are surrounded by co-ed dorms, open promiscuity, easy access to alcohol, 24 hour parties, and curfew-free nights. There weren’t any churches around campus that I was interested in so my Sundays began to feel like any other day of the week. While in college I experienced many things and learned many lessons of life but one particular experience had brought me right to the edge of cliff of death! The situation was so unexpected so shocking, so overwhelming, that I honestly felt that the only solution was suicide. It took someone whom I had known for just a little while, breaking down and crying when he realized what I was about to do, for me to just pause and think. I thought that something was truly wrong if this guy had a higher value for my life than I did. As I stood there, I never felt so empty in my life. There was the big void where my soul was supposed to be and I felt like Moses (pbuh) and his followers being chased by the enemy from all sides only to be confronted by the impassable Red Sea! I realized that it was time to make the call they had made. The call of faith-the call of God!
I decided to return to the church of my youth, a Baptist church in Washington D.C. I heard that there was a new pastor preaching there that was thorough and I decided to try him out. Praise God, the preacher was young, dynamic, and effective. He really made the Bible come to life in his sermons and made living for God seem real and worthwhile. Coming from the position of a person who was ready to kill himself, these messages were beginning to fill my emptiness and make me want to live and give life another chance. I remember the nervous excitement of accepting the call to new membership at church and the newness and freshness of being dipped into the water at my baptismal ceremony. I felt reborn! Clean! With the lips I accepted Jesus (pbuh) as my “lord and saviour” but deep down in my heart, I was just reaccepting the reality of God in my life! As I went deeper in my walk of faith the problem that had almost caused me to slay myself vanished like an illusion! Like it was only there to make me turn to my Creator! This gave me a new drive, motivation, and a sense of purpose. I became very active to the extent of encouraging a few of my friends to join the church. I would watch and listen to the pastor in awe, day dreaming of becoming one myself. I honestly felt that the best thing to do for a living would be to help people turn to God. Something that had proven to be so successful in my life. But at the same time I was always very open-minded, especially when it came to spiritual truth, I think this is what made me a vessel to receive the full truth, in Islam.
After a while I began a private hobby of studying world religions. The first book I read, “The Religion of Man”, was actually one that I had borrowed from a friend. The first chapter I read was the chapter on Islam and it was a tremendous surprise! It began with a little Arabian history and a biography of the Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) followed by an explanation of the basic tenants and doctrines of Islam. I could not believe the similarity and relationship that it had with Christianity. It wasn’t some foreign religion made up by some foreign man who worshipped some foreign God. It was the true Abrahamaic (pbuh) religion, revealed through a man whose very lineage traced back to Abraham’s (pbuh) first son Ishmael (pbuh) who worshipped the same one true God. This further fed my curiosity and interest in Islam. I had decided to keep myself open so I also read the history and doctrines of Buddhism, Hinduism, Judaism, Native American spirituality, and other smaller religious sects, cults, and movements. Buddhism seemed to renounce the world too much yet was not clear on the afterlife. In Hinduism the worship seemed too loose and unfocused with it’s great deity residing in many reforms, Judaism seemed basically true but had had too much of a racial bias, and Native American to vary by the tribe. Islam was the only one whose theology and practices seemed truly universal. The information that I had gathered so far was not enough to make me want to change my religion but that was soon to change when I came into contact with the Qur’an!
I was working at a music store where a young woman used to come to the store with whom I used to have general conversations and on one occasion happened to bring up the topic of Islam. I then found that she was a Muslim and she told me that I could get more information on Islam at a little session that her father helped teach with some other Muslim. I was both nervous and excited at my first visit but it was my first time being around real Muslims! I was initially impressed by the racial variety, the simple environment, and the warm humbleness of the attendants. They answered a few basic questions of mine but I was there mostly to listen. When it was prayer time, I quietly watched from a distance with a smile. Seeing all the men, women, and children bow in unison and put their faces flat against the ground in prayer seemed a little strange and funny, yet so humble, so unified, and so natural. It seemed like this was the ultimate way that we as God’s creations were supposed to pray. I recalled in my mind accounts in Bible of other prophets like Abraham, Moses, and Jesus (pbuh), throwing themselves to the ground in humility and prayer to God yet this is not the way we prayed in church as “Christians”, but the Muslims did! Jesus (pbuh) told us to greet each other by saying “Peace be with you”, yet we Christians didn’t do this. It was the Muslims who greeted each other saying “As-Salaamu Alaikum” which means “Peace be with you”. In Christianity only “orthodox” nuns covered their heads and bodies, but this was a standard practice of modesty, chastity and humbleness for millions of practicing Muslim women who were interactive members of the society. It wasn’t something reserved for the “orthodox”. I left that little session engulfed in a maze of thoughts.
When I saw my Muslim friend at the music store again I thanked her and told her how wonderful it was and that I was sure to return. She then asked me if I had a Qur’an yet. I said “No”. I thought that the Qur’an was only in a foreign language and that I couldn’t read it but she said that she would give me an English translation from the original Arabic. I gladly accepted the offer and was even more excited when I received it! “WOW! My first real Qur’an”. I couldn’t wait to start reading it. The first thing I did was to look up Jesus(pbuh) in the index and look up every verse it listed under his name. This was the prophet that I was raised on and was dear to me so I had to know what God had revealed in this book about him. If it degraded, ridiculed, or rejected him in any way I was going to close the book and leave Islam alone. I agreed when I read that God was not three in one but one in an exclusive and unique sense. I agreed even when I read that Jesus (pbuh) was born of a virgin but was not God’s “Son”. When I was studying idioms in ancient Hebrew and other Semitic languages “Son” meant nearness and was used in the old testament in reference to other people and prophets, the term “Son of God” meant one who was near and closely attached to God, as the term “Son of man” meant one near and close to man. Incidentally, the use of the term “Son of man” outnumbers the use of the term “Son of God” in reference to Jesus (pbuh). Even though, in the Qur’an Jesus (pbuh) was always referred to as the “Son of Mary”. God revealed that the birth of Jesus (pbuh) was like that of Adam (pbuh)-He merely said “BE” and “He was”, and Adam had neither a physical father or mother and no one worshipped him as the “Only Begotten Son of God”! I agreed when I read that Jesus(pbuh) was not God in human form but a human prophet that was created by God, sent by God and who himself needed, depended on, feared, and prayed to God. I agreed when I read that the Jews had no victory in killing him and that God raised him to Himself. But when I read that they also did not crucify him I was in shock! The impact of the 157th verse in the 4th chapter of the Qur’an was to dramatically change my life from that point on!
I’m not one to just accept something right away or to just reject something right away. I investigate. In the day I would reflect on that one verse, and at night I would pray over it. I would beg God in tears to show me in a dream what actually happened in detail to Jesus (pbuh) if he was not crucified. What was real? What was false? I wanted to know badly. I was looking hard. Examining, searching, debating. The soul was the most important thing in the world to me and mine was on a quest. I always wanted to know my Creator and serve my Creator but I wanted to make sure that I knew Him the right way and I wasn’t going to let up until I found what I felt was the right path.
When I finally stopped waiting for that big dream and asked myself “Well, what does this word crucifixion mean for the Christian?”. For the Christian this word meant salvation! Salvation meaning the deliverance from the penalty of sin which was spiritual death in Hell. It also meant success in this life and the next. To me this is the vital thing that religion must give man or else it is useless. To say that if Jesus (pbuh) was not crucified, there’s no way that God Almighty could forgive His beloved mankind did not sound right. Jesus(pbuh) was very dear to my heart and to think that the Loving, Forgiving God sent him on earth only to be murdered for an innumerable mass of sins that he himself never committed did not seem fair or even sensible. If God could create the whole universe by saying “Be” and “IT WAS” then why couldn’t He do the same for the tiny littler sinner who is admitting his guilt and asking Him for forgiveness? Why couldn’t He say to the person “Be forgiven” and he or she is forgiven? Why was the murder and blood of an innocent man a necessity for this forgiveness? I said to myself, “If this book can map out a plan of salvation that has nothing to do with murder or blood then I will submit to God and His plan”.
This made me deeply review my Bible and try to find what was essential necessity for salvation. The Jews and the Muslims never put anything in between them and their prayer to God so why did the Christians? There was nothing in between Adam and God, or Abraham and God, or Moses and God, or David and God, or Jesus and God! God had taught through the Bible that a person was individually responsible for his sins and that no one else could pay for or be penalized for them. Jesus(pbuh) was preaching repentance and telling people that their sins were forgiven before this supposed crucifixion! So why all of a sudden was the blood of one martyr necessary for humanity to be forgiven? This issue of sacrifice, blood, and forgiveness seemed to be summed up in just a few verses in the Holy Qur’an.
Concerning sacrifice chapter 22:37, had the answer, “It is not their flesh nor their blood that reaches God, it is your piety that reached Him. He has made them (animals) subject to you, that you may glorify God for His guidance to you”. Concerning sin and forgiveness God revealed in chapter 12:87, “No one despairs of God’s mercy except those who have no faith”. Also, in chapter 39:53 “do not despair of God’s mercy for God forgives all sins. He is indeed OFTEN Forgiving and Most Merciful”. I found exacting parallels in the Bible in Psalms 30:5, 32:5, 62:1-2, 1st Samuel 15:22-23, Luke 15:7-10, Ezekiel 18:20-35, Isaiah 12:2-3, and Luke 7:47-50, 10:25, 18:24, and many others if you just look them up and reflect. When I read in the Qur’an in chapter 10:57, “O mankind! There has come to you a direction from you Lord and a healing for the diseases in your hearts - and for those who believe, A Guidance and a Mercy!” I said to myself “This is it. This IS THE WORD OF GOD!!”
My Muslim Friend from the music store had shown me a mosque that to my surprise was 10 minutes away from my home! On my second visit to the mosque, I declared my faith in 1994 and stated that “There is no God worthy to be worshipped except the ONE, Most High God or Allah. That Muhammad (pbuh) is His Last Messenger to mankind. That the Qur’an is the last revealed and written will and testament of Allah to and for mankind to follow until the Day of Judgment”. I had finally come home and found peace! As I gradually built my faith and practice in ISLAM, I found that Islam was not the religion of killers and terrorists! It is the true religion of humankind, nature and all creatures seen and unseen. Islam is by name the religion of those who seek peace and success through obedience and submission to the will of Allah! I had found the path to success, the path to true salvation! Allah in the revelation of the Qur’an has refocused all forms of worship, prayer, fear and thanx to Him and Him alone! You are High, Lord of all creations, and has reminded mankind and all creations of their true place-dependent and subservient to Allah and Allah alone!
Aaron Haroon Sellars
Disclaimer: This convert story has been published on ChallengeYourSoul.com as is, without being edited. It may promote views & ideas not supported by ChallengeYourSoul.com and/or which are not Islamically correct.
Why did I accept Islam? This is a question that I have been asked many times by others, and a question that I have asked myself many times.
Firstly, it was the Will of God because it is He that changes hearts and guides someone to a way that is straight! Secondly, because I was looking for the truth, the real truth and nothing but the truth! Thirdly, because there were doctrinal elements in my previous religion of Christianity that at first hearing seemed acceptable but when reflected, analyzed, and prayed upon, proved to be not only unacceptable but also contradictory, inconsistent, and even blasphemous! But why ISLAM? Why, when I was looking for the real and whole truth did God guide me to Islam and not to one of many religions available to man or just another branch of Christianity? The answer to this important question was to unfold as I took my first steps towards my spiritual quest.
The basic seed of God-consciousness was implanted in me from birth, but my soul was moulded to the teachings of the Christian church. My religious upbringing was never something that was forced, nor was it just occasional or just habitual. It seemed to be a natural and essential part of the fibre of my family. One of my fondest childhood memories till this day is of my mother reading me Bible stories every Sunday. But when I reached my teens and especially when I entered college, that spiritual nurturing became tainted more and more.
The college scene is where most people of religious background either completely abandon that upbringing or like in my case, just put it on pause. It’s really hard not to when you are surrounded by co-ed dorms, open promiscuity, easy access to alcohol, 24 hour parties, and curfew-free nights. There weren’t any churches around campus that I was interested in so my Sundays began to feel like any other day of the week. While in college I experienced many things and learned many lessons of life but one particular experience had brought me right to the edge of cliff of death! The situation was so unexpected so shocking, so overwhelming, that I honestly felt that the only solution was suicide. It took someone whom I had known for just a little while, breaking down and crying when he realized what I was about to do, for me to just pause and think. I thought that something was truly wrong if this guy had a higher value for my life than I did. As I stood there, I never felt so empty in my life. There was the big void where my soul was supposed to be and I felt like Moses (pbuh) and his followers being chased by the enemy from all sides only to be confronted by the impassable Red Sea! I realized that it was time to make the call they had made. The call of faith-the call of God!
I decided to return to the church of my youth, a Baptist church in Washington D.C. I heard that there was a new pastor preaching there that was thorough and I decided to try him out. Praise God, the preacher was young, dynamic, and effective. He really made the Bible come to life in his sermons and made living for God seem real and worthwhile. Coming from the position of a person who was ready to kill himself, these messages were beginning to fill my emptiness and make me want to live and give life another chance. I remember the nervous excitement of accepting the call to new membership at church and the newness and freshness of being dipped into the water at my baptismal ceremony. I felt reborn! Clean! With the lips I accepted Jesus (pbuh) as my “lord and saviour” but deep down in my heart, I was just reaccepting the reality of God in my life! As I went deeper in my walk of faith the problem that had almost caused me to slay myself vanished like an illusion! Like it was only there to make me turn to my Creator! This gave me a new drive, motivation, and a sense of purpose. I became very active to the extent of encouraging a few of my friends to join the church. I would watch and listen to the pastor in awe, day dreaming of becoming one myself. I honestly felt that the best thing to do for a living would be to help people turn to God. Something that had proven to be so successful in my life. But at the same time I was always very open-minded, especially when it came to spiritual truth, I think this is what made me a vessel to receive the full truth, in Islam.
After a while I began a private hobby of studying world religions. The first book I read, “The Religion of Man”, was actually one that I had borrowed from a friend. The first chapter I read was the chapter on Islam and it was a tremendous surprise! It began with a little Arabian history and a biography of the Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) followed by an explanation of the basic tenants and doctrines of Islam. I could not believe the similarity and relationship that it had with Christianity. It wasn’t some foreign religion made up by some foreign man who worshipped some foreign God. It was the true Abrahamaic (pbuh) religion, revealed through a man whose very lineage traced back to Abraham’s (pbuh) first son Ishmael (pbuh) who worshipped the same one true God. This further fed my curiosity and interest in Islam. I had decided to keep myself open so I also read the history and doctrines of Buddhism, Hinduism, Judaism, Native American spirituality, and other smaller religious sects, cults, and movements. Buddhism seemed to renounce the world too much yet was not clear on the afterlife. In Hinduism the worship seemed too loose and unfocused with it’s great deity residing in many reforms, Judaism seemed basically true but had had too much of a racial bias, and Native American to vary by the tribe. Islam was the only one whose theology and practices seemed truly universal. The information that I had gathered so far was not enough to make me want to change my religion but that was soon to change when I came into contact with the Qur’an!
I was working at a music store where a young woman used to come to the store with whom I used to have general conversations and on one occasion happened to bring up the topic of Islam. I then found that she was a Muslim and she told me that I could get more information on Islam at a little session that her father helped teach with some other Muslim. I was both nervous and excited at my first visit but it was my first time being around real Muslims! I was initially impressed by the racial variety, the simple environment, and the warm humbleness of the attendants. They answered a few basic questions of mine but I was there mostly to listen. When it was prayer time, I quietly watched from a distance with a smile. Seeing all the men, women, and children bow in unison and put their faces flat against the ground in prayer seemed a little strange and funny, yet so humble, so unified, and so natural. It seemed like this was the ultimate way that we as God’s creations were supposed to pray. I recalled in my mind accounts in Bible of other prophets like Abraham, Moses, and Jesus (pbuh), throwing themselves to the ground in humility and prayer to God yet this is not the way we prayed in church as “Christians”, but the Muslims did! Jesus (pbuh) told us to greet each other by saying “Peace be with you”, yet we Christians didn’t do this. It was the Muslims who greeted each other saying “As-Salaamu Alaikum” which means “Peace be with you”. In Christianity only “orthodox” nuns covered their heads and bodies, but this was a standard practice of modesty, chastity and humbleness for millions of practicing Muslim women who were interactive members of the society. It wasn’t something reserved for the “orthodox”. I left that little session engulfed in a maze of thoughts.
When I saw my Muslim friend at the music store again I thanked her and told her how wonderful it was and that I was sure to return. She then asked me if I had a Qur’an yet. I said “No”. I thought that the Qur’an was only in a foreign language and that I couldn’t read it but she said that she would give me an English translation from the original Arabic. I gladly accepted the offer and was even more excited when I received it! “WOW! My first real Qur’an”. I couldn’t wait to start reading it. The first thing I did was to look up Jesus(pbuh) in the index and look up every verse it listed under his name. This was the prophet that I was raised on and was dear to me so I had to know what God had revealed in this book about him. If it degraded, ridiculed, or rejected him in any way I was going to close the book and leave Islam alone. I agreed when I read that God was not three in one but one in an exclusive and unique sense. I agreed even when I read that Jesus (pbuh) was born of a virgin but was not God’s “Son”. When I was studying idioms in ancient Hebrew and other Semitic languages “Son” meant nearness and was used in the old testament in reference to other people and prophets, the term “Son of God” meant one who was near and closely attached to God, as the term “Son of man” meant one near and close to man. Incidentally, the use of the term “Son of man” outnumbers the use of the term “Son of God” in reference to Jesus (pbuh). Even though, in the Qur’an Jesus (pbuh) was always referred to as the “Son of Mary”. God revealed that the birth of Jesus (pbuh) was like that of Adam (pbuh)-He merely said “BE” and “He was”, and Adam had neither a physical father or mother and no one worshipped him as the “Only Begotten Son of God”! I agreed when I read that Jesus(pbuh) was not God in human form but a human prophet that was created by God, sent by God and who himself needed, depended on, feared, and prayed to God. I agreed when I read that the Jews had no victory in killing him and that God raised him to Himself. But when I read that they also did not crucify him I was in shock! The impact of the 157th verse in the 4th chapter of the Qur’an was to dramatically change my life from that point on!
I’m not one to just accept something right away or to just reject something right away. I investigate. In the day I would reflect on that one verse, and at night I would pray over it. I would beg God in tears to show me in a dream what actually happened in detail to Jesus (pbuh) if he was not crucified. What was real? What was false? I wanted to know badly. I was looking hard. Examining, searching, debating. The soul was the most important thing in the world to me and mine was on a quest. I always wanted to know my Creator and serve my Creator but I wanted to make sure that I knew Him the right way and I wasn’t going to let up until I found what I felt was the right path.
When I finally stopped waiting for that big dream and asked myself “Well, what does this word crucifixion mean for the Christian?”. For the Christian this word meant salvation! Salvation meaning the deliverance from the penalty of sin which was spiritual death in Hell. It also meant success in this life and the next. To me this is the vital thing that religion must give man or else it is useless. To say that if Jesus (pbuh) was not crucified, there’s no way that God Almighty could forgive His beloved mankind did not sound right. Jesus(pbuh) was very dear to my heart and to think that the Loving, Forgiving God sent him on earth only to be murdered for an innumerable mass of sins that he himself never committed did not seem fair or even sensible. If God could create the whole universe by saying “Be” and “IT WAS” then why couldn’t He do the same for the tiny littler sinner who is admitting his guilt and asking Him for forgiveness? Why couldn’t He say to the person “Be forgiven” and he or she is forgiven? Why was the murder and blood of an innocent man a necessity for this forgiveness? I said to myself, “If this book can map out a plan of salvation that has nothing to do with murder or blood then I will submit to God and His plan”.
This made me deeply review my Bible and try to find what was essential necessity for salvation. The Jews and the Muslims never put anything in between them and their prayer to God so why did the Christians? There was nothing in between Adam and God, or Abraham and God, or Moses and God, or David and God, or Jesus and God! God had taught through the Bible that a person was individually responsible for his sins and that no one else could pay for or be penalized for them. Jesus(pbuh) was preaching repentance and telling people that their sins were forgiven before this supposed crucifixion! So why all of a sudden was the blood of one martyr necessary for humanity to be forgiven? This issue of sacrifice, blood, and forgiveness seemed to be summed up in just a few verses in the Holy Qur’an.
Concerning sacrifice chapter 22:37, had the answer, “It is not their flesh nor their blood that reaches God, it is your piety that reached Him. He has made them (animals) subject to you, that you may glorify God for His guidance to you”. Concerning sin and forgiveness God revealed in chapter 12:87, “No one despairs of God’s mercy except those who have no faith”. Also, in chapter 39:53 “do not despair of God’s mercy for God forgives all sins. He is indeed OFTEN Forgiving and Most Merciful”. I found exacting parallels in the Bible in Psalms 30:5, 32:5, 62:1-2, 1st Samuel 15:22-23, Luke 15:7-10, Ezekiel 18:20-35, Isaiah 12:2-3, and Luke 7:47-50, 10:25, 18:24, and many others if you just look them up and reflect. When I read in the Qur’an in chapter 10:57, “O mankind! There has come to you a direction from you Lord and a healing for the diseases in your hearts - and for those who believe, A Guidance and a Mercy!” I said to myself “This is it. This IS THE WORD OF GOD!!”
My Muslim Friend from the music store had shown me a mosque that to my surprise was 10 minutes away from my home! On my second visit to the mosque, I declared my faith in 1994 and stated that “There is no God worthy to be worshipped except the ONE, Most High God or Allah. That Muhammad (pbuh) is His Last Messenger to mankind. That the Qur’an is the last revealed and written will and testament of Allah to and for mankind to follow until the Day of Judgment”. I had finally come home and found peace! As I gradually built my faith and practice in ISLAM, I found that Islam was not the religion of killers and terrorists! It is the true religion of humankind, nature and all creatures seen and unseen. Islam is by name the religion of those who seek peace and success through obedience and submission to the will of Allah! I had found the path to success, the path to true salvation! Allah in the revelation of the Qur’an has refocused all forms of worship, prayer, fear and thanx to Him and Him alone! You are High, Lord of all creations, and has reminded mankind and all creations of their true place-dependent and subservient to Allah and Allah alone!
A Journey Towards the Light
A Journey Towards the Light
Disclaimer: This convert story has been published on ChallengeYourSoul.com as is, without being edited. It may promote views & ideas not supported by ChallengeYourSoul.com and/or which are not Islamically correct.
Assalamu alaykum wa rahmatullah wa baraktuh
Bismillahir Rahmanir Rahim
It was back in 1995, when I began to seek for the meaning and truth in my life. The days were without any happiness, just filled with stress, and mean less things.
I was at a point in my life, which made me harsh and stubborn, and I was indeed in need, for putting my self together, as a complete person. To find your self, and to figure out where to belong, was quite difficult. Our media was at that time beginning talking about Islam, and for me, well I found it interesting.
I had already the Holy Qur'an in my book shelter, but since I got it as a gift, I hadn't used time reading or even looking inside the book.
But somehow, one day, I went and took the book, and began to read. I guess, I sad for hours, not even looking at the clock, I just read and read. Amazing, how time just went, and there were, at no time, any reaction towards stopping. I was surprised by my feelings, because each and every word was making sense to me. I wondered how it could be, that I hadn't discovered so much truth before this particular day. And in the same time, I got a feeling of peace, and being relaxed, more than I ever felt before in my life.
From that day, I began on a daily basis, to read little by little, and to discover things, which I didn't think about, or gave attention before, became so much clearer to me. Sure I believed in God, but in the same time, I didn't reflect on it, with any deeper meaning.
I was born and raised up in a Christian – catholic family, and had a much uncomplicated childhood, living in Denmark. My family was between being religious and non-religious. I was teached both towards Christian and Catholics belief, but was not attached to any of them in main. So when I began to mark the interest for Islam, it changed my viewpoint, to be much more open and clear. I searched for books, and began to read more often, even went to a Mosque, and was invited to come back as much I liked.
I found the Muslims there, to be very friendly, and helpful, and I even got new friends in some of them. I must say, my eyes were open and my mind busy, with the new things, which came towards me. An Imam, in the Mosque, became a very good help, and today, He is a close friend to me. He planted a seed inside me, which began to grow, and made me understand many things, which I stumbled over in my readings. With his books, and talks, I learned so much, and it increased my knowledge about Islam and Muslims.
During a couple of years, I did my study, and knew that I was on the way, into a new period of my life. There was so many reflections, and thoughts going true my mind, and questions to be asked. But each time, I always got the answers, from Qur'an and from my new friends. When the time finally arrived, and I was ready, to pronounce my Shahada, really that was the best day ever in my life.
A few days, before, I got a vision or guidance, so to speak, and still today, I'm pretty convinced that Allah gave me the final push. I was about to go showering, and were making everything ready, as I entered under the water, standing there, suddenly I became a totally blackout. I couldn't see a thing, and had to grab with my hands, for not falling, on the wet floor. I don’t know, for how long I was standing there, but I felt fear, then within a sec, a clear and bright light, came towards me, it was so sharp, and I couldn't look direct into it. I had to see, with half open eyes, and my entire body was shaking. It went on for some time, and everything around me was totally silent, no voices or moves. But I began to feel very relaxed and some kind of peaceful inside, suddenly, as when you push a bottom, the light went off, and all were back to normal.
At least, I felt it was normal, but then without any reason, my mind began to play with me, I kept saying, you must become a Muslim, and then I knew, it was meant for me, to finally take my last step, and become a Muslim.
Later, I had talks, with other new Muslim about what happened, and I realized that I was not alone; many of them had the same visions. Many before me and many in the future will become visions or guidance like I did.
Allahu Akbar.
Allah works in many ways, and without Him we are nothing.
My journey went on, and within time I came to meet many different kinds of Muslims. Different viewpoints, and practice, sects, and various kinds of ways, to understand Islam. For quit some years, I was Shia, and worked with dawah and other Islamic things, to teach others and to help the new, coming to Islam, with prayers and much more, I was making fundraising, site's on the net and translating books, even I made Islamic movies and traveled around talking about Islam in public.
My time, as Shia, was doubtful, and for me a time, when I discovered mistakes, and uncorrected teachings of Islam.
Sure, I was, at a time, so very convinced, that being shia was the right way, and the right path. But deep inside, I had the doubt, and kept turning back to my books, when I was following Sunnah of the Prophet, salallahu alaihi wasallam, and the Qur'an. Because deep inside, I felt lost, which was right? In the end, I had to realize, that being Shia was not the correct way, of traveling towards Paradise. So after a long time, of thinking, and waving between the differences, I made the choice, to follow The Sunnah, as being righteous and best way to be a true and sincere Muslim. I know, that for many new coming to Islam, it is difficult, as today so much different information is to find out there. But one should remain towards Qur'an and the Sunnah of the Prophet, salallahu alaihi wa sallam, then nothing can go wrong, and then you are on the right path.
There is a Hadith, which I love too much, it makes so much sense, and make us understand that we are not alone, at no time in our life. This hadith is taken from Sahid Muslim, and it says this;
"Worship Allah as if you see Him and if you don’t see Him, know that He sees you"
To try and explain, this text, well, when anyone reads it, the truth is already understood inside the mind.
Coming back towards the light, is a journey, which took part over several years, and a lot of hard work on the way. To remember is that we all are born as Muslims. But as newborn, we are not cable of making our own choices. Some of us go in directions far from Islam, and some are raised up as Muslim from birth.
But do not fear, because as I mentioned, Allah has He's ways, to make everything, and let you, by your mind, choose your way back.
Just think vas me, my life before was not choices made by me, but by my parents. As I grow up, and began to understand, then it was up to me, to find my right place in this life. Al hamdulilAllah.
No matter, how dark, everything seems to be, the light is out there, and open for anyone, who has the heart, and mind, clear for understanding the signs, the real facts, and today:
I can proudly say: how lucky I am, because I am a Muslim.
Disclaimer: This convert story has been published on ChallengeYourSoul.com as is, without being edited. It may promote views & ideas not supported by ChallengeYourSoul.com and/or which are not Islamically correct.
Assalamu alaykum wa rahmatullah wa baraktuh
Bismillahir Rahmanir Rahim
It was back in 1995, when I began to seek for the meaning and truth in my life. The days were without any happiness, just filled with stress, and mean less things.
I was at a point in my life, which made me harsh and stubborn, and I was indeed in need, for putting my self together, as a complete person. To find your self, and to figure out where to belong, was quite difficult. Our media was at that time beginning talking about Islam, and for me, well I found it interesting.
I had already the Holy Qur'an in my book shelter, but since I got it as a gift, I hadn't used time reading or even looking inside the book.
But somehow, one day, I went and took the book, and began to read. I guess, I sad for hours, not even looking at the clock, I just read and read. Amazing, how time just went, and there were, at no time, any reaction towards stopping. I was surprised by my feelings, because each and every word was making sense to me. I wondered how it could be, that I hadn't discovered so much truth before this particular day. And in the same time, I got a feeling of peace, and being relaxed, more than I ever felt before in my life.
From that day, I began on a daily basis, to read little by little, and to discover things, which I didn't think about, or gave attention before, became so much clearer to me. Sure I believed in God, but in the same time, I didn't reflect on it, with any deeper meaning.
I was born and raised up in a Christian – catholic family, and had a much uncomplicated childhood, living in Denmark. My family was between being religious and non-religious. I was teached both towards Christian and Catholics belief, but was not attached to any of them in main. So when I began to mark the interest for Islam, it changed my viewpoint, to be much more open and clear. I searched for books, and began to read more often, even went to a Mosque, and was invited to come back as much I liked.
I found the Muslims there, to be very friendly, and helpful, and I even got new friends in some of them. I must say, my eyes were open and my mind busy, with the new things, which came towards me. An Imam, in the Mosque, became a very good help, and today, He is a close friend to me. He planted a seed inside me, which began to grow, and made me understand many things, which I stumbled over in my readings. With his books, and talks, I learned so much, and it increased my knowledge about Islam and Muslims.
During a couple of years, I did my study, and knew that I was on the way, into a new period of my life. There was so many reflections, and thoughts going true my mind, and questions to be asked. But each time, I always got the answers, from Qur'an and from my new friends. When the time finally arrived, and I was ready, to pronounce my Shahada, really that was the best day ever in my life.
A few days, before, I got a vision or guidance, so to speak, and still today, I'm pretty convinced that Allah gave me the final push. I was about to go showering, and were making everything ready, as I entered under the water, standing there, suddenly I became a totally blackout. I couldn't see a thing, and had to grab with my hands, for not falling, on the wet floor. I don’t know, for how long I was standing there, but I felt fear, then within a sec, a clear and bright light, came towards me, it was so sharp, and I couldn't look direct into it. I had to see, with half open eyes, and my entire body was shaking. It went on for some time, and everything around me was totally silent, no voices or moves. But I began to feel very relaxed and some kind of peaceful inside, suddenly, as when you push a bottom, the light went off, and all were back to normal.
At least, I felt it was normal, but then without any reason, my mind began to play with me, I kept saying, you must become a Muslim, and then I knew, it was meant for me, to finally take my last step, and become a Muslim.
Later, I had talks, with other new Muslim about what happened, and I realized that I was not alone; many of them had the same visions. Many before me and many in the future will become visions or guidance like I did.
Allahu Akbar.
Allah works in many ways, and without Him we are nothing.
My journey went on, and within time I came to meet many different kinds of Muslims. Different viewpoints, and practice, sects, and various kinds of ways, to understand Islam. For quit some years, I was Shia, and worked with dawah and other Islamic things, to teach others and to help the new, coming to Islam, with prayers and much more, I was making fundraising, site's on the net and translating books, even I made Islamic movies and traveled around talking about Islam in public.
My time, as Shia, was doubtful, and for me a time, when I discovered mistakes, and uncorrected teachings of Islam.
Sure, I was, at a time, so very convinced, that being shia was the right way, and the right path. But deep inside, I had the doubt, and kept turning back to my books, when I was following Sunnah of the Prophet, salallahu alaihi wasallam, and the Qur'an. Because deep inside, I felt lost, which was right? In the end, I had to realize, that being Shia was not the correct way, of traveling towards Paradise. So after a long time, of thinking, and waving between the differences, I made the choice, to follow The Sunnah, as being righteous and best way to be a true and sincere Muslim. I know, that for many new coming to Islam, it is difficult, as today so much different information is to find out there. But one should remain towards Qur'an and the Sunnah of the Prophet, salallahu alaihi wa sallam, then nothing can go wrong, and then you are on the right path.
There is a Hadith, which I love too much, it makes so much sense, and make us understand that we are not alone, at no time in our life. This hadith is taken from Sahid Muslim, and it says this;
"Worship Allah as if you see Him and if you don’t see Him, know that He sees you"
To try and explain, this text, well, when anyone reads it, the truth is already understood inside the mind.
Coming back towards the light, is a journey, which took part over several years, and a lot of hard work on the way. To remember is that we all are born as Muslims. But as newborn, we are not cable of making our own choices. Some of us go in directions far from Islam, and some are raised up as Muslim from birth.
But do not fear, because as I mentioned, Allah has He's ways, to make everything, and let you, by your mind, choose your way back.
Just think vas me, my life before was not choices made by me, but by my parents. As I grow up, and began to understand, then it was up to me, to find my right place in this life. Al hamdulilAllah.
No matter, how dark, everything seems to be, the light is out there, and open for anyone, who has the heart, and mind, clear for understanding the signs, the real facts, and today:
I can proudly say: how lucky I am, because I am a Muslim.
A Blind Woman Sees The Light
A Blind Woman Sees The Light
Disclaimer: This convert story has been published on ChallengeYourSoul.com as is, without being edited. It may promote views & ideas not supported by ChallengeYourSoul.com and/or which are not Islamically correct.
The name I am called by my Christian parents is Bobbie Evans, but the name I am known by in the Muslim community is Khadija Evans. This is the story of how my husband and I came to embrace Islam.
I can remember standing in the kitchen of the house I lived in when I was just seven or eight years old and looking towards the door that went outside. I prayed to a god whom I wasn’t sure existed and I begged Him to show himself to me if He was really there. Nothing happened.
I can remember being nine or ten years old and writing a letter to God and hiding it in the heat register in my bedroom, thinking God, if He existed, would come and retrieve it and answer my prayers. But the next day, the letter was still there.
I had always had a hard time accepting the existence of God, and of understanding the beliefs taught in Christian churches. Even though my parents weren’t very religious, and rarely went to church, they thought it was best that my two brothers and I go. We were allowed to choose our religion when we very young. I think I was about six or seven, and my brothers were one and two years older then I. I chose a Methodist church for no other reason then it was a few blocks away from our house, and my brothers chose a Lutheran church because it was also close, and I hadn’t chosen it.
I went to the church until I was thirteen years old. I was baptized and confirmed there when I was 11. I went along with the baptism and confirmation because all children who were 11 received confirmation, and if they hadn’t already been baptized, that was done at the same time. Even then I knew that doubts about God and Christian teachings were things best kept to myself.
When I was 13 my family moved to another town with no churches within walking distance, and my parents weren’t eager to get up early and drive us kids to church, and so our religious training stopped until I was 15 and my mom suddenly found religion. She began attending an Assembly of God church, occasionally dragging my dad along. I went willingly. I had already begun a search for God that wouldn’t end until I was 42 years old. I remember being “born again”. Caught up in the fervor of the hell and damnation that the minister preached at the Assembly of God church. I became “high on religion” thinking I had finally found “Him.” Little did I know, but the high would be short lived, as I again began to have doubts and unanswered questions. When I was 17 I met the daughter of an assistant Baptist minister and began going to their church. I had been sexually abused by my dad from the time I was at least six years old and I told the assistant minister about it. He arranged with my parents to let me live with him and his family in a type of “private foster care.” My dad paid him $100 a week. My parents also attended the church for a brief time, until the minister announced on the pulpit that my dad was a child molester. Before that though, my mom, dad and I were each baptized at the church.
One day after spending the day with my parents I returned to my foster home only to find the house empty. Cleaned out. Not a stick of furniture. We found out that the minister had been caught embezzling from the church and he and his family had left town in a hurry. I returned to my parents home and the abuse.
As a result of that incident what little faith I had in God was totally lost and I became an atheist. For the next 25 years I would fluctuate between believing, wanting to believe, and Agnosticism, and Atheism.
When I was twenty-six, I went to three months of Rights of Initiation for Catholic Adults and then was baptized and confirmed in the Roman Catholic Church. I had been allowed to by-pass the full year of classes because I hadn’t called the church to inquire about converting until three months before the Easter Vigil Mass when confirmation for adults was held.
I had entered the Catholic religion with the same philosophy that I had once heard Alcoholics Anonymous has, “Bring your body, your mind will follow.” I didn’t really believe in God, or in the core teachings of the Catholic Church, but I wanted so badly to believe in a power higher then myself, that I went faithfully to mass seven days a week, hoping that somehow I would start to believe. But after several months, I began to realize that it wasn’t going to happen, and my mass attendance became a once a week thing, then once a month, until when I was thirteen and met the man who today is my husband and who wasn’t Catholic, I stopped attending mass altogether.
I had never told anyone, before my husband, that I didn’t believe in God. I don’t think he took me seriously at first. I don’t think he had ever known an Atheist.
My husband is 29 years older then me. We’ve had a wonderful marriage for these last 10 years. When we first met, I still desperately wanted to believe, and kept making him promise me that “When you get to Heaven” he would ask God to give me the strength to believe, and he if at all possible, he would give me a sign, one that I couldn’t chalk up to my imagination, so I would know there really was a god. He always promised me he would. We were living in rural Alabama when I was 32 years old. I developed ulcerations on both corneas and when they healed, I was legally blind. Because of damage from infection that had been done to the tissue that donated corneas would have to adhere to, I couldn’t find an eye surgeon who believed that transplanted corneas wouldn’t be rejected.
I was still searching for God. I was searching for hope of something better then what this world had to offer. Some kind of evidence of the chance for existence after death. Some way to achieve it. I listened to Christian programs on the Trinity Broadcasting Network, even though I couldn’t find any ministers on the station who’s opinion I trusted. I watched anyway, hoping that one would say something that would click in my mind, and I would finally know, that “Yes, there really is a god.” None of them ever said anything that caused that connection to happen, though many said things that confused me even more.
During the first 10 years after I became legally blind, I tried attending different churches, Baptist again, Assembly of God again, non-Denominational, Church of God, Mormon, and even studied up on Wicca. But I always lost interest after just a few months. Things the religions taught just didn’t add up. There were just too many things left to faith. Things that had no proof other then one’s faith. I couldn’t believe something when the only proof were some words in a book that in large part didn’t make sense.
I remember one night when I was about 35 years old, lying in bed and praying to God, whom I still wasn’t sure existed, and asking Him that if He did exist to lead me to someone who could help me to believe. But I found no one.
At age 36 I acquired a braille Bible and started reading it, once again hoping to find proof of God’s existence. But with the Bible being so hard to understand, with so much of it not really being explainable, I lost interest after reading just a few of its books.
At about that time, though still wanting to find God, I gave up my search. I had become completely disillusioned with religion.
On September 11, 2001 I was sitting at my computer. It was before 9 a.m. and as usual the television, which was sitting to my right, was turned on for background noise. I heard the sound that is made to notify viewers of an important news announcement. I stopped and turned towards the TV. A reporter began talking and one of the towers of the World Trade Center showed in the background. He said an accident had happened. A small plane had hit one of the towers of the World Trade Center. I’m legally blind, but I could see well enough to know that it wasn’t a small plane that had hit the tower. The hole was massive. And I didn’t think it was possible to accidentally hit something so big.
As I watched, another plane flew into the other tower. I couldn’t see the plane itself, it was too small for me to see, but I saw the fireball that exploded away from the building.
I jumped up and ran into the bedroom and told my husband to hurry and get up because terrorists were flying planes into the World Trade Center buildings! He immediately got out of bed and came in to the living room and sat in his recliner and began to watch. It was about 9 a.m.
As time went by it was announced that a plane had been flown into the Pentagon and another hijacked plane had crashed in Pennsylvania. I wondered when it would end? And what in the world was going on??? The reporter said it looked like “debris” was falling from the building. My husband said it was people jumping. Something he has never been able to forget. I was grateful that my vision was to bad for me to be able to make out what even looked like “debris”. “The reporter said a part of the first tower had fallen away from the building. He spoke in a kind of hesitant voice. Now I wonder if he was unsure of what he was seeing. Because we later found out that a part of the building hadn’t fallen away. The building had completely collapsed.
A female reporter was crying and a male reporter hugged her. I was crying too. And my husband hugged me.
For weeks afterward I would start crying for no apparent reason. I’d be riding on the bus and have to turn my head towards the window and pretend I was looking out so that others wouldn’t see the tears escaping my eyes.
When we were in a restaurant, I’d have to use my napkin to dab the tears welling up in my eyes before the other diners noticed and wondered if I was some kind of a nut.
I was Christian then and I cared. And I was devastated. I couldn’t understand how a religion could promote such violence, as the media was saying Islam did. It made no sense to me. So I decided to find out for myself. One way or another I wanted to know the truth. Because of my partial blindness I was limited to information from the internet. Finding braille books about Islam in braille or ink print that was large enough for me to read was impossible. I was able to use a computer because I had magnification software installed so I could enlarge the font on the screen to a size that I could read.
I did searches and I began to read about Islam. I went to web sites that taught the basics of Islam, and I joined Muslim women’s e-groups where I was able to ask and get answers that I confirmed through further research.
I’ve always been a sceptic. It’s always been hard for me to believe something that I didn’t understand. I was never one to believe something simply because someone said it was so. I had to know it in my mind as well as in my heart.
While studying Islam I learned that the god Muslims worship is the same god as that of Christians and Jews. The god of Abraham and Moses. I found that Islam doesn’t promote or condone hatred of non-Muslims, nor does it condone the killing of innocent people.
By studying Islam I found the answers that the media wasn’t telling us and I came to know that Islam is the True Religion. I read a lot of convincing evidence, but the things that proved to me that there is a god, and that Islam is the True Religion and that that the Qur’an is the Word of God, were those in the Qur’an itself. The things that are of a scientific nature. Things that have only been discovered by scientists in the last 100 years. The only one who could have known those things 1400 years ago was God.
For example, One day I was at a web site that was about some of the scientific proofs in the Qur’an. One of the verses in the Qur’an tells about the death of our own solar system. Al-Rahman 37-38
“When the sky is torn apart, so it was (like) a red rose like ointment. Then which of the favors of your lord will you deny?” There was a link that went to the NASA web site. When I clicked the link I had no idea what was going to be on the next page, but what I saw took my breath away. Tears came to my eyes. I knew - if I had had any doubts left - I knew at the moment, that Islam was the True Religion of God.
The page the link took me to showed what looked like a rose. It was the “Cat’s Eye Nebula.” Which was an exploding star 3000 light years away. It had been photographed with the Hubble Space Telescope. Scientists say that it is the same fate that awaits our own solar system. Muslims refer to it as the “Rose Nebula.” It had been described in the Qur’an 1400 years ago. People back then had no way of knowing about it. Only God could have known.
After accepting in my mind as well as in my heart that Islam is the True Religion, I knew that I was already a Muslim and the only thing left was to profess my faith.
I looked in an internet directory for mosques in my community. I called the one in the next town and told the person who answered the phone that I wanted to convert to Islam, and asked him when I could make my Shahada. He told me to be there at 4 p.m. on Saturday when the imam would also be there. I told him that I ride the bus everywhere and it wouldn’t be running late enough for me to be able to get back home and so could I come earlier? He said not to worry, someone would give me a ride home. I arrived as scheduled, and as God had scheduled, so began my new life. I have since come to realize that on that day, the greatest event of my life occurred. I had always thought that the most wonderful thing to ever happen to me was the day that I married my husband. But I now know it wasn’t. The most important day of my life was the day I made my Shahada and accepted Islam as the way of life God intended me to live. It was the day I acknowledged that Islam is the way to salvation, to Heaven, and I made a choice to practice it.
I can’t say my husband was thrilled by my reverting to Islam. He believed what the media was saying about Muslims and the religion. He didn’t like it that I went to the mosque several evenings a week and left him home alone to be bored. One night after he was finished complaining about me going again I sat down a few feet away from him and I calmly told him, “I will never ask you to practice a religion you don’t believe in. I love you too much to try and force that on you. But I do want you to learn about Islam so that you will at least understand what it is I believe.” I then stood up and went into the bedroom and finished dressing to go to the mosque. I kissed him goodbye and I left.
When I returned home I found his whole attitude had changed. He was bright and cheerful. That night, before going to bed, he began to learn about Islam.
My husband began going to the mosque with me. While I studied with the sisters, he would talk with a brother and ask him questions. At home he read things on the internet, and books that he had borrowed from the mosque. We would discuss different things he was learning, and I would point things out to him.
When the day came and he told me about how some aspect of Islam was to be practiced, in a “know it all” tone of voice, as if it were a fact, something that I myself didn’t know, I asked him to tell me “How do you know that??” and he replied, “Because it’s in the Qur’an!” I was stunned! He believed! He knew that Islam was True! If it was in the Qur’an, as far as he was concerned it was true! Thirty-six days after I publicly professed my faith in God and His messenger, prophet Muhammad, my husband professed his. We had an Islamic marriage ceremony the same evening. I cried when my husband made his Shahada. I knew we would be in Eternity together!
A month before, a brother had asked me what I thought the chances of my husband converting were. I told him, “Zero.” I said, “I can’t imagine someone so dramatically changing their beliefs after having believed something else for 70 years. But 14 days before his 71st birthday he embraced Islam as his religion and his way of life. In the Muslim community we have found another family. We have found friendship, love and acceptance that was taught in the Christian religions we practiced at different points in my life, but that we felt never actually existed among most of the members of the churches we went to.
Many of the Muslims in our area are immigrants, but we have found no intolerance of Americans whether they are Muslim or not. We were both welcomed into the family of Islam the very first time each of us went to the mosque. We’ve always felt welcome and accepted.
Since embracing Islam We have found direction and purpose for our lives. We have found the meaning for our existence. We have come to realize that we really are here only for a short time and that what comes afterwards is far better then the fleeting pleasures that this world has to offer us.
I have found a sense of security concerning life after death that I had never known before. We have both come to see the problems that we once saw as being major as actually being opportunities to grow. We thank God for what we do have, as well for what we don’t. Today we are Muslim. We still care about 9/11. I still cry when I think a little too much about the events of that day. My husband still remembers the people jumping from the buildings. We wish all we could say about that day was where we had been when we heard that the WTC had been attacked. But we did see it happen, and it was the most devastating thing to ever happen in our lives. But from tragedy came victory. From death has come the knowledge that we will have life after our death. And it will be spent together.
Disclaimer: This convert story has been published on ChallengeYourSoul.com as is, without being edited. It may promote views & ideas not supported by ChallengeYourSoul.com and/or which are not Islamically correct.
The name I am called by my Christian parents is Bobbie Evans, but the name I am known by in the Muslim community is Khadija Evans. This is the story of how my husband and I came to embrace Islam.
I can remember standing in the kitchen of the house I lived in when I was just seven or eight years old and looking towards the door that went outside. I prayed to a god whom I wasn’t sure existed and I begged Him to show himself to me if He was really there. Nothing happened.
I can remember being nine or ten years old and writing a letter to God and hiding it in the heat register in my bedroom, thinking God, if He existed, would come and retrieve it and answer my prayers. But the next day, the letter was still there.
I had always had a hard time accepting the existence of God, and of understanding the beliefs taught in Christian churches. Even though my parents weren’t very religious, and rarely went to church, they thought it was best that my two brothers and I go. We were allowed to choose our religion when we very young. I think I was about six or seven, and my brothers were one and two years older then I. I chose a Methodist church for no other reason then it was a few blocks away from our house, and my brothers chose a Lutheran church because it was also close, and I hadn’t chosen it.
I went to the church until I was thirteen years old. I was baptized and confirmed there when I was 11. I went along with the baptism and confirmation because all children who were 11 received confirmation, and if they hadn’t already been baptized, that was done at the same time. Even then I knew that doubts about God and Christian teachings were things best kept to myself.
When I was 13 my family moved to another town with no churches within walking distance, and my parents weren’t eager to get up early and drive us kids to church, and so our religious training stopped until I was 15 and my mom suddenly found religion. She began attending an Assembly of God church, occasionally dragging my dad along. I went willingly. I had already begun a search for God that wouldn’t end until I was 42 years old. I remember being “born again”. Caught up in the fervor of the hell and damnation that the minister preached at the Assembly of God church. I became “high on religion” thinking I had finally found “Him.” Little did I know, but the high would be short lived, as I again began to have doubts and unanswered questions. When I was 17 I met the daughter of an assistant Baptist minister and began going to their church. I had been sexually abused by my dad from the time I was at least six years old and I told the assistant minister about it. He arranged with my parents to let me live with him and his family in a type of “private foster care.” My dad paid him $100 a week. My parents also attended the church for a brief time, until the minister announced on the pulpit that my dad was a child molester. Before that though, my mom, dad and I were each baptized at the church.
One day after spending the day with my parents I returned to my foster home only to find the house empty. Cleaned out. Not a stick of furniture. We found out that the minister had been caught embezzling from the church and he and his family had left town in a hurry. I returned to my parents home and the abuse.
As a result of that incident what little faith I had in God was totally lost and I became an atheist. For the next 25 years I would fluctuate between believing, wanting to believe, and Agnosticism, and Atheism.
When I was twenty-six, I went to three months of Rights of Initiation for Catholic Adults and then was baptized and confirmed in the Roman Catholic Church. I had been allowed to by-pass the full year of classes because I hadn’t called the church to inquire about converting until three months before the Easter Vigil Mass when confirmation for adults was held.
I had entered the Catholic religion with the same philosophy that I had once heard Alcoholics Anonymous has, “Bring your body, your mind will follow.” I didn’t really believe in God, or in the core teachings of the Catholic Church, but I wanted so badly to believe in a power higher then myself, that I went faithfully to mass seven days a week, hoping that somehow I would start to believe. But after several months, I began to realize that it wasn’t going to happen, and my mass attendance became a once a week thing, then once a month, until when I was thirteen and met the man who today is my husband and who wasn’t Catholic, I stopped attending mass altogether.
I had never told anyone, before my husband, that I didn’t believe in God. I don’t think he took me seriously at first. I don’t think he had ever known an Atheist.
My husband is 29 years older then me. We’ve had a wonderful marriage for these last 10 years. When we first met, I still desperately wanted to believe, and kept making him promise me that “When you get to Heaven” he would ask God to give me the strength to believe, and he if at all possible, he would give me a sign, one that I couldn’t chalk up to my imagination, so I would know there really was a god. He always promised me he would. We were living in rural Alabama when I was 32 years old. I developed ulcerations on both corneas and when they healed, I was legally blind. Because of damage from infection that had been done to the tissue that donated corneas would have to adhere to, I couldn’t find an eye surgeon who believed that transplanted corneas wouldn’t be rejected.
I was still searching for God. I was searching for hope of something better then what this world had to offer. Some kind of evidence of the chance for existence after death. Some way to achieve it. I listened to Christian programs on the Trinity Broadcasting Network, even though I couldn’t find any ministers on the station who’s opinion I trusted. I watched anyway, hoping that one would say something that would click in my mind, and I would finally know, that “Yes, there really is a god.” None of them ever said anything that caused that connection to happen, though many said things that confused me even more.
During the first 10 years after I became legally blind, I tried attending different churches, Baptist again, Assembly of God again, non-Denominational, Church of God, Mormon, and even studied up on Wicca. But I always lost interest after just a few months. Things the religions taught just didn’t add up. There were just too many things left to faith. Things that had no proof other then one’s faith. I couldn’t believe something when the only proof were some words in a book that in large part didn’t make sense.
I remember one night when I was about 35 years old, lying in bed and praying to God, whom I still wasn’t sure existed, and asking Him that if He did exist to lead me to someone who could help me to believe. But I found no one.
At age 36 I acquired a braille Bible and started reading it, once again hoping to find proof of God’s existence. But with the Bible being so hard to understand, with so much of it not really being explainable, I lost interest after reading just a few of its books.
At about that time, though still wanting to find God, I gave up my search. I had become completely disillusioned with religion.
On September 11, 2001 I was sitting at my computer. It was before 9 a.m. and as usual the television, which was sitting to my right, was turned on for background noise. I heard the sound that is made to notify viewers of an important news announcement. I stopped and turned towards the TV. A reporter began talking and one of the towers of the World Trade Center showed in the background. He said an accident had happened. A small plane had hit one of the towers of the World Trade Center. I’m legally blind, but I could see well enough to know that it wasn’t a small plane that had hit the tower. The hole was massive. And I didn’t think it was possible to accidentally hit something so big.
As I watched, another plane flew into the other tower. I couldn’t see the plane itself, it was too small for me to see, but I saw the fireball that exploded away from the building.
I jumped up and ran into the bedroom and told my husband to hurry and get up because terrorists were flying planes into the World Trade Center buildings! He immediately got out of bed and came in to the living room and sat in his recliner and began to watch. It was about 9 a.m.
As time went by it was announced that a plane had been flown into the Pentagon and another hijacked plane had crashed in Pennsylvania. I wondered when it would end? And what in the world was going on??? The reporter said it looked like “debris” was falling from the building. My husband said it was people jumping. Something he has never been able to forget. I was grateful that my vision was to bad for me to be able to make out what even looked like “debris”. “The reporter said a part of the first tower had fallen away from the building. He spoke in a kind of hesitant voice. Now I wonder if he was unsure of what he was seeing. Because we later found out that a part of the building hadn’t fallen away. The building had completely collapsed.
A female reporter was crying and a male reporter hugged her. I was crying too. And my husband hugged me.
For weeks afterward I would start crying for no apparent reason. I’d be riding on the bus and have to turn my head towards the window and pretend I was looking out so that others wouldn’t see the tears escaping my eyes.
When we were in a restaurant, I’d have to use my napkin to dab the tears welling up in my eyes before the other diners noticed and wondered if I was some kind of a nut.
I was Christian then and I cared. And I was devastated. I couldn’t understand how a religion could promote such violence, as the media was saying Islam did. It made no sense to me. So I decided to find out for myself. One way or another I wanted to know the truth. Because of my partial blindness I was limited to information from the internet. Finding braille books about Islam in braille or ink print that was large enough for me to read was impossible. I was able to use a computer because I had magnification software installed so I could enlarge the font on the screen to a size that I could read.
I did searches and I began to read about Islam. I went to web sites that taught the basics of Islam, and I joined Muslim women’s e-groups where I was able to ask and get answers that I confirmed through further research.
I’ve always been a sceptic. It’s always been hard for me to believe something that I didn’t understand. I was never one to believe something simply because someone said it was so. I had to know it in my mind as well as in my heart.
While studying Islam I learned that the god Muslims worship is the same god as that of Christians and Jews. The god of Abraham and Moses. I found that Islam doesn’t promote or condone hatred of non-Muslims, nor does it condone the killing of innocent people.
By studying Islam I found the answers that the media wasn’t telling us and I came to know that Islam is the True Religion. I read a lot of convincing evidence, but the things that proved to me that there is a god, and that Islam is the True Religion and that that the Qur’an is the Word of God, were those in the Qur’an itself. The things that are of a scientific nature. Things that have only been discovered by scientists in the last 100 years. The only one who could have known those things 1400 years ago was God.
For example, One day I was at a web site that was about some of the scientific proofs in the Qur’an. One of the verses in the Qur’an tells about the death of our own solar system. Al-Rahman 37-38
“When the sky is torn apart, so it was (like) a red rose like ointment. Then which of the favors of your lord will you deny?” There was a link that went to the NASA web site. When I clicked the link I had no idea what was going to be on the next page, but what I saw took my breath away. Tears came to my eyes. I knew - if I had had any doubts left - I knew at the moment, that Islam was the True Religion of God.
The page the link took me to showed what looked like a rose. It was the “Cat’s Eye Nebula.” Which was an exploding star 3000 light years away. It had been photographed with the Hubble Space Telescope. Scientists say that it is the same fate that awaits our own solar system. Muslims refer to it as the “Rose Nebula.” It had been described in the Qur’an 1400 years ago. People back then had no way of knowing about it. Only God could have known.
After accepting in my mind as well as in my heart that Islam is the True Religion, I knew that I was already a Muslim and the only thing left was to profess my faith.
I looked in an internet directory for mosques in my community. I called the one in the next town and told the person who answered the phone that I wanted to convert to Islam, and asked him when I could make my Shahada. He told me to be there at 4 p.m. on Saturday when the imam would also be there. I told him that I ride the bus everywhere and it wouldn’t be running late enough for me to be able to get back home and so could I come earlier? He said not to worry, someone would give me a ride home. I arrived as scheduled, and as God had scheduled, so began my new life. I have since come to realize that on that day, the greatest event of my life occurred. I had always thought that the most wonderful thing to ever happen to me was the day that I married my husband. But I now know it wasn’t. The most important day of my life was the day I made my Shahada and accepted Islam as the way of life God intended me to live. It was the day I acknowledged that Islam is the way to salvation, to Heaven, and I made a choice to practice it.
I can’t say my husband was thrilled by my reverting to Islam. He believed what the media was saying about Muslims and the religion. He didn’t like it that I went to the mosque several evenings a week and left him home alone to be bored. One night after he was finished complaining about me going again I sat down a few feet away from him and I calmly told him, “I will never ask you to practice a religion you don’t believe in. I love you too much to try and force that on you. But I do want you to learn about Islam so that you will at least understand what it is I believe.” I then stood up and went into the bedroom and finished dressing to go to the mosque. I kissed him goodbye and I left.
When I returned home I found his whole attitude had changed. He was bright and cheerful. That night, before going to bed, he began to learn about Islam.
My husband began going to the mosque with me. While I studied with the sisters, he would talk with a brother and ask him questions. At home he read things on the internet, and books that he had borrowed from the mosque. We would discuss different things he was learning, and I would point things out to him.
When the day came and he told me about how some aspect of Islam was to be practiced, in a “know it all” tone of voice, as if it were a fact, something that I myself didn’t know, I asked him to tell me “How do you know that??” and he replied, “Because it’s in the Qur’an!” I was stunned! He believed! He knew that Islam was True! If it was in the Qur’an, as far as he was concerned it was true! Thirty-six days after I publicly professed my faith in God and His messenger, prophet Muhammad, my husband professed his. We had an Islamic marriage ceremony the same evening. I cried when my husband made his Shahada. I knew we would be in Eternity together!
A month before, a brother had asked me what I thought the chances of my husband converting were. I told him, “Zero.” I said, “I can’t imagine someone so dramatically changing their beliefs after having believed something else for 70 years. But 14 days before his 71st birthday he embraced Islam as his religion and his way of life. In the Muslim community we have found another family. We have found friendship, love and acceptance that was taught in the Christian religions we practiced at different points in my life, but that we felt never actually existed among most of the members of the churches we went to.
Many of the Muslims in our area are immigrants, but we have found no intolerance of Americans whether they are Muslim or not. We were both welcomed into the family of Islam the very first time each of us went to the mosque. We’ve always felt welcome and accepted.
Since embracing Islam We have found direction and purpose for our lives. We have found the meaning for our existence. We have come to realize that we really are here only for a short time and that what comes afterwards is far better then the fleeting pleasures that this world has to offer us.
I have found a sense of security concerning life after death that I had never known before. We have both come to see the problems that we once saw as being major as actually being opportunities to grow. We thank God for what we do have, as well for what we don’t. Today we are Muslim. We still care about 9/11. I still cry when I think a little too much about the events of that day. My husband still remembers the people jumping from the buildings. We wish all we could say about that day was where we had been when we heard that the WTC had been attacked. But we did see it happen, and it was the most devastating thing to ever happen in our lives. But from tragedy came victory. From death has come the knowledge that we will have life after our death. And it will be spent together.
Monday, January 12, 2009
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